elcome to The Week's "What Next?" contest, an invitation to test your powers of imagination with challenges inspired by current events.
Results: We asked you to predict a headline that would make Americans as happy as “Will & Kate to Wed” made folks in Britain, and you rolled out:
THE WINNER: Wall Street Infested with Bed Bugs
Robert Hogan, New York City
SECOND PLACE: Aliens Invade Earth, Eat Politicians, Pee Gasoline
Jim Topper, Turtle Creek, PA
THIRD PLACE: Greenspan Residence in Foreclosure
Rick Ostrander, Beaufort, SC
Brad and Jennifer Re-Unite
Mike Paul, Carrboro, NC
"Gotcha!" Congress Admits Dem/GOP Bickering a "Joke"
Caleb Shreves, McCausland, IA
Al Qaeda Calls it Quits
Joe Snyder, West Grove, PA
Bin Laden Joins Facebook
Stan Gray, Brush, CO
China Outsources Jobs to U.S.
John Besnard, Irvine, CA
Campaign Advertising Outlawed
Ashley Ryan, Catonsville, MD
Dodgers Return to Brooklyn
Ed Hayes, Yuma, AZ
Oprah Agrees to One More Year
Rich Stanko, Omaha
Trump to Get Haircut on Live TV
Gary Hennion, New York City
Healthcare for All Elected Officials Expires Dec. 31
Tim Popp, Phillips, WI
McDonald's Makes McRib Permanent
Kerry Howe, Tempe, AZ
WikiLeaks Reveals Bristol Really Won "Dancing with the Stars"
Lesandre Barley & John Reilly, Running Springs, CA
Incontrovertible Proof Found: Wrestling is Fixed
Miles Klein, Frisco, TX
TV Hiring 5M Unemployed Americans for New Reality Show, "Junk Food Fantasy"
Pat Rauscher, Cortez, CO
Lucy Lets Charlie Brown Kick Football
Leslie O’Hara, Point Richmond, CA
Yes, Virginia, There Is a Santa Claus
Edmund Conti, Raleigh, NC
THE WEEK'S AUDIOPHILE PODCASTS: LISTEN SMARTER
- Why is American internet so slow?
- What the collapse of the Ming Dynasty can tell us about American decline
- 7 ways to be the most interesting person in any room
- 10 things you need to know today: March 10, 2014
- Colorado’s new ‘drive high, get a DUI’ commercials are actually pretty clever
- What would a U.S.-Russia war look like?
- 22 TV shows to watch in 2014
- Why is it so expensive to build a bridge in America?
- 10 classic Sesame Street moments we wouldn't show today's kids
- The GOP must try to win over African Americans
Subscribe to the Week