1. The Google employee who rapped about Google
A Google employee who calls himself Fink has made a terrifically bad rap video about how great it is to work at Google. Sample lyric: "More than amazing, we're more than search / more than a website, more then Maps or Earth." I dare you to watch the whole thing:
Fink is hardly the first offender to make an embarrassing rap video and post it on the internet. Here, four others that will similarly make you squirm in your seat. (Warning: Some strong language ahead.)
2. The girl who rapped about the "poison" that is homosexuality
This lovely young woman uses hip-hop to examine the hot-button topic of gay marriage, which she sees as a sinful plague destroying our nation. Sample line: "Homosexuality is not innate / it is not a genetic trait / cannot replicate / the love between a man and a woman / which God did indeed create." (Via BuzzFeed)
3. The Staten Island crew that rapped about prescription drug abuse
These outer-borough "artists" call themselves the White Trash Clan (get it?), and drew the ire of critics for openly celebrating the ethereal bliss of prescription drug abuse, an idea that's not exactly new to hip-hop, but should ideally be left to artists with more finesse. Sample line: "I can stop when I want to / I'm not addicted."
Unfortunately, the video attracted the wrong kind of attention. According to Gothamist, the young lady playing the "blue fairy" in the video was later arrested along with 32 other people during an NYPD narcotics bust. Oops. (Via Gothamist)
4. The church group that rapped "Jesus is my n***a"
That's the only sample lyric you need to understand how terrible this video is. Now, there's a chance the video is a hoax of sorts, although that doesn't discount the fact that someone took the time to write the script, find clueless actors, and film the whole thing. (Via Boing Boing)
5. The New England prep school kids who rapped about how awesome WASPs are
This New England prep-school parody rap, which was released by Smirnoff to promote its new "Raw Tea" beverage, inexplicably went viral in 2007. It perfectly captures why other countries hate America. Sample line: "Haters like to clown our Ivy League educations / but they're just jealous because our families run the nation." I'm so sorry. (Via Digiday)
THE WEEK'S AUDIOPHILE PODCASTS: LISTEN SMARTER
- Why is American internet so slow?
- What would a U.S.-Russia war look like?
- Don't worry: World War III will almost certainly never happen
- What the collapse of the Ming Dynasty can tell us about American decline
- 4 life hacks from ancient philosophers that will make you happier
- The Daily Show explains Hamid Karzai's 'Afghan Hustle'
- 22 TV shows to watch in 2014
- Mitt Romney, 2016 frontrunner*
- Russia's Ukraine invasion is a moral crisis
- The end of academic freedom?
Subscribe to the Week