1. One Direction's Harry Styles reportedly wishes he had never dated Taylor Swift
Taylor Swift claims she knew ex-boyfriend Harry Styles was trouble from the get-go. Styles, on the other hand, had no idea how much trouble their breakup would be. The Sun reports that the One Direction singer now wishes he had never dated Swift, presumably because she's spent the months since their breakup slamming him in songs, music videos, and awards-show performances. "He just doesn't know what to expect. It wasn't the most amicable of splits," says a source, adding that Styles plans to "get on with his life. Perhaps something that Taylor should consider too." Even though her entire music career is literally built on doing the opposite of that.
2. Kanye West and Kim Kardashian's baby will allegedly be named 'North'
The Sun reports that Kim Kardashian and Kanye West plan to forego the Kardashian family's obnoxious tradition of names beginning with "K," instead opting to name their child "North." That would make the child's name "North West," in what we swear is an actual story and not just a particularly uninspired Jay Leno monologue joke. Though West reportedly chose the name because he thinks it "sounds good with his surname," it remains possible that he's just a huge Elijah Wood fan.
3. The next James Bond movie won't be ready for another three years
Attention, megalomaniacal supervillains: MGM politely requests that you put your plans of world domination on hold for a while. According to The Guardian, MGM chairman and CEO Gary Barber recently told investors that the studio hopes to release the next James Bond film "within the next three years." "We are very excited about the franchise," said Barber, which should probably go without saying — the last movie in the franchise earned five Oscar nominations and more than a billion dollars.
4. AMC asked Jon Hamm to wear underwear while filming Mad Men
Is that a pack of Lucky Strikes in his pocket, or is Don Draper just happy to see us? According to the New York Daily News, Mad Men star Jon Hamm was "politely instructed" to wear underwear while filming Mad Men by an AMC representative because his "impressive anatomy" was becoming too distracting. When asked for comment on the story, a representative for Hamm complained that the report was "ridiculous and not funny at all," thereby instantly making the story both more ridiculous and funnier.
5. Seth MacFarlane and Emilia Clarke have called it quits
As we learned from Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett, some celebrity odd couples are just too odd to work — including, alas, Family Guy creator/Oscar host Seth MacFarlane and Game of Thrones star/Mother of Dragons Emilia Clarke. According to Starpulse, MacFarlane and Clarke ended their relationship due to "different schedules and distance." "It was a really a location challenge," says a source, presumably referring to the distance between MacFarlane's home in Los Angeles and Clarke's habit of aimlessly wandering around with her dragons in the Red Waste.
THE WEEK'S AUDIOPHILE PODCASTS: LISTEN SMARTER
- After Ferguson: Stop deferring to the cops
- How to adopt the perfect rescue dog
- 43 TV shows to watch in 2014
- The hilarious hypocrisy of Republicans complaining about the imperial presidency
- Ferguson riots were terrible — but this racist reaction was worse
- How to be the most productive person in your office — and still get home by 5:30 p.m.
- Why the poor can't catch a break on Thanksgiving
- In Ferguson, Michael Brown lost his life — and America's police lost the benefit of the doubt
- 8 tricks to surviving the holidays without gaining weight or being grouchy
- Is it now OK to have sex with animals?
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