As America's inexplicable fascination with Miley Cyrus' terrible performance at the Video Music Awards reaches its third day, a new leaked single has arrived to fan the flames a little longer. "Twerk" — a collaboration between Cyrus and Justin Bieber — has hit the internet, and it's everything you were afraid it would be.
"Twerk," which clocks in at a mercifully brief 2:34, opens with Cyrus squeaking, "I came up in this party time to twerk, I came up in this part and I'm turnt," before she eventually devolves into chanting "twerk" over and over again like a deranged parrot. With Cyrus having set the stage for this clunky affair, the song introduces Bieber, singing a verse about dancing in the club that's so generic it should come pre-packaged in electronic keyboards. Would you believe that he asks a pretty girl her name? That he wants to see her get down on the floor? That they're gonna party all night?
It's probably worth noting that "Twerk" was originally supposed to be a Lil Twist song featuring Cyrus and Bieber, though the rapper doesn't appear on the track. It's possible that this isn't the final version of "Twerk," and that Lil Twist will appear on an officially released version later this year — but it's hard to imagine him doing anything but turning this straw into more straw.
THE WEEK'S AUDIOPHILE PODCASTS: LISTEN SMARTER
- How U.S. special forces are preparing for the worst-case scenario in North Korea
- Here's the schedule very successful people follow every day
- What would a U.S.-Russia war look like?
- I hate Ayn Rand — but here's why my fellow conservatives love her
- 7 things the world's happiest people do every day
- The best online movies to watch this weekend
- The real story behind Deliver Us From Evil
- The 11 worst fast food restaurants in America
- 7 language habits that reveal your age
Subscribe to the Week