- corrections & clarifications April 8
A frantic Massachusetts woman called police Saturday night after hearing banging noises in her home. Police rushed to the scene, only to find no signs of a break-in. They did, however, find — as The Associated Press so elegantly puts it — "a soot-covered wood duck."
"It sounded like someone was in the house going through all of our things," Melinda Costanzo of North Reading told The Daily Mail. "I was convinced someone was in the house. I was trembling." Costanzo can sleep easier tonight knowing water fowl were the only intruders in her home.
The officers concluded that the duck had flown in through the chimney. Luckily, the bird was forgiven of its crimes — according to The Associated Press, "an officer caught the duck and released it into a nearby pond."- -
THE WEEK'S AUDIOPHILE PODCASTS: LISTEN SMARTER
- The U.S. Marines are developing laser weapons. Here's why.
- 3 horrific inaccuracies in Homeland's depiction of Islamabad
- 43 TV shows to watch in 2014
- Paul Krugman, Amazon, and the left's backwards view of book-industry titans
- How to be the most productive person in your office — and still get home by 5:30 p.m.
- Gamergate has backfired spectacularly on its nincompoop perpetrators
- Why the Supreme Court is allowing Texas to hold an unconstitutional election
- The one thing the New Atheists get right about religion
- How 1,000-year lifespans could remake the economy
- 6 things the happiest families all have in common
Subscribe to the Week