Results: In light of a recent study that found our simian cousins share an ability to laugh, we asked you for the very first, pre-historic, possibly even pre-human joke. Or at least the very first line of the very first joke, 1,000,000 B.C. You swung in with:
FIRST PRIZE: Why did the Archaeopteryx cross the road?
To get there before the chicken!
Barry Cutler, Palm Desert, CA
SECOND PRIZE: A pterodactyl walks into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "Why the long face?"
Miles Klein, Frisco, TX
THIRD PRIZE: Take my gatherer. Please!
Reid Robash, Racine, WI (first of several, similar)
A chimp, a gorilla and an orangutan walk into a clearing…
Beth Kolbow, New Haven, IN
A brontosaurus, a saber-toothed tiger and a rabbi walk into a cave...
Barbara Hoffman, Philadelphia, PA
So three homosapiens walk upright into a bar...
Paul Lopez, Glendale, CA (and many similar to all of the above!)
Chimp #1: What make chimp poker champion go ape?
Chimp #2: When someone call him 'Cheetah!'
John R. McElwain, Valencia, CA
Earl Schwartz, Silver Springs, FL
Darwin the neighborhood!
Walt Cates, Tallahassee, FL
Kathy Kottaras, Glendale, CA
Why did the wooly mammoth paint its toenails red?
So that it could hide in cherry trees!
Al Michetti, Loveland, OH
Why did the Australopithecus wear a belt?
Because his pants were Lucy.
Glenn Edwards, Houston, TX
Is that a banana in your fur or are you just happy to see me?
Steven Sashen, Boulder, CO (first of several, similar)
What happens when you cross a dinosaur with a skunk?
You get ex-STINK!
Roy C. Boon, Tucson, AZ
Pull my opposable thumb.
Cynthia Evans, Swansea, IL (first of several, similar)
Did you hear the one about.... oh, wait a minute. This is the first joke!
John Weigel, Nacogdoches, TX
THE WEEK'S AUDIOPHILE PODCASTS: LISTEN SMARTER
- Chuck Hagel was a huge mistake
- Yes, the Obama administration's green loans are unprofitable. They should be.
- 43 TV shows to watch in 2014
- What would it take for humans to build a settlement on Mars?
- 5 quick things you can do today to boost your creativity
- Obama just kneecapped Jeb Bush and Chris Christie's 2016 prospects
- Want to eliminate the scourge of frat culture? Lower the drinking age.
- It's official: The religious right is calling it quits
- Why we gossip, according to science
- 13 vegetarian dishes for Thanksgiving
Subscribe to the Week