Suspect flees to...police headquarters
A St. Louis man trying to escape pursuing police officers ran straight into police headquarters. Suspect Joseph Meacham was pulled over for an alleged traffic violation in his car by the cops, but fled on foot. At full sprint, Meacham ducked into a building, not noticing the sign saying “Police Headquarters,” and was apprehended by two cops. “He should have cut out the middle man and gone straight to jail,” said one of the arresting cops.

Kim Kardashian's baby plans
Expectant mother Kim Kardashian will spend $1 million on the delivery of her baby, said the National Enquirer. The reality TV star and her rapper boyfriend, Kanye West, have reserved a deluxe birthing suite for the July delivery, which will be blanketed in dozens of white roses, staffed by a celebrity hairdresser and a personal photographer, and feature special organic clothes and sheets for the baby. Kardashian will wear selections from the $25,000 in lingerie she bought on a recent Paris trip, a source said, because she “had no intention of wearing a plain old hospital gown that’s been worn by other women.”

Fortune teller predicts arrival of mad customer
A Spanish businessman broke into a fortune teller’s home to demand a refund for a “love spell” he had bought—only to discover the clairvoyant had predicted his arrival and already called the police. José Laparra, president of a soccer club, had paid $210,000 to Lucía Martín to bewitch a woman for him, but became furious when the spell failed to work. He and four other men showed up at her home, where the waiting police arrested him.