Burglars butt-dial 911
Two burglars accidentally “butt-dialed” 911, enabling police dispatchers to listen in as they allegedly broke into a car. Police said Nathan Teklemariam and Carson Rinehart, both 20, were driving around Fresno, Calif., when one of their cellphones shifted in their pocket and dialed the emergency number. A 911 operator listened for 40 minutes as the duo allegedly boasted about breaking into cars, and dispatched officers after hearing the sound of a car window being shattered. After being arrested, one suspect said, “This phone really called 911? Damn.”

Justin Bieber’s abandoned pet monkey
Animal experts are worried about the mental health of Justin Bieber’s abandoned pet monkey, O.G. Mally. German border guards impounded the capuchin in March after the Canadian pop star flew into the country without the proper pet paperwork. Since Bieber never got back to them, a German official said, “we [presume] the animal will stay in Germany long term.” Animal behavior expert Dr. Florian Brandes said Mally urgently needed to be integrated with other capuchins at a zoo, warning, “He is at grave risk of psychological problems in the future if this is not achieved.”

Georgia student fakes a kidnapping
A Georgia college student faked his own kidnapping to avoid telling his parents he was flunking English. After receiving the F grade, Aftab Aslam, 19, texted his parents on behalf of a group of make-believe abductors, warning them not to call police or he would be killed. He camped out for eight days but came home when the weather turned cold and rainy, and was arrested for making false statements.