How to converse properly: 18 tips from old etiquette books

"Never ask a lady a question about anything whatever"

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Etiquette was a booming business in the 19th century. Industrialization meant that people were moving between places and classes in a way they hadn't before, and there was a great demand for guidance on how to fit into the social circles that people had either gotten themselves into, or wanted to get into. Hundreds of etiquette books were published in this period, and they all had something to say about how to use language. Here are 18 perfectly charming rules on how to converse properly, culled from 19th-century etiquette books.

Some of the rules are quite sensible. For example, don't be a jerk, a pretentious jerk, or a teenager.

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Arika Okrent

Arika Okrent is editor-at-large at TheWeek.com and a frequent contributor to Mental Floss. She is the author of In the Land of Invented Languages, a history of the attempt to build a better language. She holds a doctorate in linguistics and a first-level certification in Klingon. Follow her on Twitter.