'Heteropaternal superfecundation,’ and more

Good week for:

'Heteropaternal superfecundation,’ after Mia Washington of Texas entered the biology textbooks because a DNA test revealed that her 11-month-old twins have different fathers. She admitted to have been sleeping with two men when they were conceived.

Internships, after a small Spokane, Wash., distillery developed a small army of volunteers to bottle and package its vodka and gin for no pay, as long as they get free shots of the products at the end of their shift. “It’s grown popular entirely by word-of-mouth,” said Don Poffenroth of Dry Fly Distilling.

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Miracles, after a Texas couple reported finding a Cheetos cheese snack that bears an incredible resemblance to Jesus. Dan and Sara Bell said they will see what they can get for “Cheesus” on eBay. “If it’s only 25 cents, we’re just going to eat it,” said Dan.

Bad week for:

Maureen Dowd, The New York Times columnist, who admitted that a 43-word paragraph in a recent column was nearly identical to a paragraph written by blogger Josh Marshall. Dowd’s explanation was that she somehow lifted the paragraph from a conversation with a friend, who “must have read Josh Marshall without mentioning that to me.”

Driving under the influence, after a Massachusetts man was ticketed for driving erratically while eating a bowl of cereal on his lap. He explained that he was hungry.

Bodybuilding, after doping officials showed up to do steroid tests at the Belgian bodybuilding championship, and all 20 muscled competitors grabbed their gear and ran out the door. “I have never seen anything like it,” said doping official Hans Cooman.