Give me your confused, your aggravated, your bewildered. Send me your perplexed, your rattled, your befuddled masses yearning to breathe free.

Yes indeed — I'm the new advice columnist at TheWeek.com, and I'm here to steer you right on dating dilemmas, parenting pickles, workplace woes, and every juicy quandary in between. 

As a veteran journalist, I've reported on opportunities that spring from wise decisions, and unfortunate incidents that arise from bad ones. And like you, I've been through some stuff.

Named for a song in the rock musical Hair, in which my father starred naked, I survived a Hollywood hippie childhood to become a news reporter,...  More»

Dear Starshine,

I have had a crush on a gentleman for quite some time. If he ever asks me out and we become a couple, when should I tell him about my STD (Herpes II)? And, then ... HOW do I tell him? This has kept me single and alone for a long time because I just don't know how to do this.

Well, don't lead with the STD. There are things to tell a fella on your first date (you're a vegetarian, you have a teenage son, you've always wanted to see Spain) and then there are things to tell him before he's got your undies in his teeth (I have an incurable STD that gives me contagious genital sores)....  More»

Dear Starshine,

What do you do when you find out your 16-year-old son is smoking pot?

Marijuana is on its way to being legalized in this country. (It's taking a long time, and if you've ever watched a pothead try to accomplish something, even open a new bag of Cheetos, you'll understand why). But it still won't be legal for 16-year-olds, and that's a good thing.

Like alcohol, pot poses some legitimate dangers for teens. So address it the way you would anything else that's both fun and potentially scary: Arm him with the information he needs to make intelligent choices....  More»

Dear Starshine,

My wife basically dresses me. I'm in my 40s, and she's barely 30, so she has a completely different style than me. We mainly hang out with her friends, and they're all what you'd consider hipsters. She's taken to buying hipster clothing, and whenever I've deviated from wearing these things, I've caught hell, so I gave up. These clothes include skinny jeans, plaid shirts, cardigans, and thick-framed glasses. She even made me get a trendy haircut. The problem is, I'm my own man, and I don't really like this look. Even more, I feel that given my age, I shouldn't be trying to dress like someone half my age....  More»

Dear Starshine,

My ex and I recently got back together after trying to be apart for a while. We had some disagreements during the getting-back-together phase and one evening I decided to go out drinking with friends. Long story short, I had way too much to drink and all I remember is waking up the next morning. Friends told me about the hilarious things I did that I have no memory of. A very dear friend of mine told me that I kissed him and he was too drunk to stop me. It must have lasted a couple of minutes at most. I have absolutely no recollection of this but I have no reason to doubt my friend's story either....  More»

Dear Starshine,

How would you tell someone you love that they have bad breath?

It depends: Do they love you back? Because let's face it, nobody wants to hear that.

But if you must, there are thoughtful ways to convey the bad news. My best friend once offered me a mint and when I declined, she said, "You know… when a friend offers you a mint, you really should take it." I took the hint and the mint. I like that she cared enough to tell me what no one else would have, and to do it in a way that carefully avoided the words "your" and "breath" and "reeks right now....  More»

Dear Starshine,

I'm organizing a trip to see a hockey game with a bunch of male friends. Once I'd sent round an email about it, one of the newer members of the group replied saying he'd love to come — and so would his wife. I didn't explicitly call it a "guys' night," but all the invitees were male, so I had assumed it was implied. Can we ask him to leave his wife at home, or should we just extend the invite to all our wives and girlfriends? His wife is five months pregnant, which makes it all the more difficult to tell her she can't come. 

Let me say up front that I adore women....  More»

Dear Starshine,

My husband and I don't have children. We don't want any. Yet I find it awkward when people ask whether we have kids. When I say "no," they might think I want them but am unable to have them (people tend to look sympathetic) or people assume that I'll change my mind, and tell me so. (Despite my age, I still look like I'm in prime child-bearing years. Yay, me?) Some people flat-out ask why we don't have kids, and I've tried different answers. (I'll say, "Don't want them" only to be asked why, even though "don't want them" is reason enough; "I'd be a horrible mom," I say with a smile, only to hear, "But you're good with your cats!...  More»

Dear Starshine,

I have organized a trip for the past seven years with a great group of friends, but my oldest friend since childhood has never been invited because distance has grown between us, my husband does not enjoy her company, and another close friend has married my oldest friend's ex. Last year, my old friend called the place where we vacation and made arrangements to be there the same weekend as us (she knew through a mutual friend that we were going). She then invited me as if she had no clue I was going, and then invited other families, too....  More»

Dear Starshine,

My boyfriend — let's call him Pete — and I have been together for three years, and are engaged to be married. Pete was chubby when I met him, and has gained 40 pounds since we've been a couple. I was chubby when we met, too. But in the past 15 months, through diet and rigorous exercise, I've become slim and toned. I simply wanted to be healthy and have more energy — and my attraction to Pete has not waned. But recently, he was taken to the ER with chest pains, diagnosed with high blood pressure, and advised by his doctor to lose weight....  More»

Dear Starshine,

Any recommendations for how to remember your lover's name in bed? After nearly four years with the same guy, I've got a new one. And I cannot for the life of me remember his name when we're in the throes of it — and have to stop myself from using the last one's name. I get stuck saying "oh, babe" so that I don't accidentally yell, "oh, Mike" (ex's name) instead of "oh, Steve" (new guy). I'm constantly terrified. Suggestions?

Hold on just a sec. You want me to rustle up sympathy because there are too many men making you wail in ecstasy? OK, look, I'm going to help you, but only because there are too few people out there with truly enviable...  More»

Dear Starshine,

Is it normal for adults (late 20, early 30s) to leave a restaurant table before the main course to smoke weed in an alleyway? Because recently, my dining companions did just that. I'm not a stodgy grump with weed phobias, but I find the action of removing oneself from an evening of drinks and dining with friends to smoke a J rather rude, and I'm taking it personally. Is my conversation so dull and unappealing that you must get stoned to tolerate it? I'm thinking of extracting myself from future dining adventures with these "friends" in favor of those who enjoy my company in a more sober state....  More»