I read it in the tabloids
It must be true...
■ A Bernie Sanders supporter who lost a bet on the presidential election now has a permanent reminder of the vote: a tattoo of Donald Trump’s face on his lower back. Iowan Zach Cobert was so certain that the Republican would be defeated that he made a bet with a Trumpbacking buddy, pledging to get a tattoo of Trump if the businessman won. A week after Election Day, Cobert made good on his promise and got inked with a “Trump stamp,” which he called “the stupidest thing I’ve done.” His girlfriend agreed. “I’m not happy with [the tattoo],” said Jenni Gang. “I have to look at it forever.”
■ China has blocked social media users from calling North Korea’s portly dictator Kim Jong Un “Kim Fatty III,” “Kim Abundant III,” and “Kim Fat Fatty,” after complaints from their ally’s regime. The now-blocked nicknames poked fun at the Glorious Leader’s ever-expanding waistline—the cheese-loving Kim has reportedly gained nearly 100 pounds—and his status as the third generation of the Kim family to rule his country. Creative Chinese social media users now refer to the double-chinned despot as Chubby III, Kim Fatty 2+1, and Kim Fat Fat Fat.
■ A New York City woman is suing fashion retailer Zara after a dress she bought came with an unwelcome accessory: a dead rat sewn into the hem. Cailey Fiesel, 24, noticed that a “disturbingly pungent odor” followed her around when she first wore the foreign-made, $40 dress to work. When she investigated, she found the leg of a dead rat protruding from a seam. Fiesel is suing for unspecified damages, saying Zara dresses should be “free from defects, including rodent infestations.”