It must be true... I read it in the tabloids
▪ A Wisconsin man accidentally shot a nail into his heart, then calmly drove himself to the hospital. Doug Bergeson was installing a fireplace when he dropped his nail gun and it fired toward him. He said it “kind of stung” when the 3½-inch nail lodged in hi to the emergency room. “Eight miles in,” he admitted, “it started to hurt quite a bit.”
▪ A British man brought his half-drowned pet tortoise back to life by giving her mouthto- mouth resuscitation. John Fletcher discovered Freda lifeless at the bottom of his garden pond. When he began administering CPR, the reptile coughed up some water and started twitchisaid Fletcher. “She’s just walking around and looking at things like normal.”
▪ A Florida man fishing off a pier was shocked when he found a drunken woman at the end of his line. Police said Alexandria Turner, 22, was swimming near the St._Johns County Pier, saw the line in the water, bit into it, and swam off with the lure. When officers asked T urner to explain her actions, she allegedly became belligerent and screamed, “I’m f---ing naked!” She was charged with disorderly intoxication.