It must be true... I read it in the tabloids
■ A Philadelphia woman was stunned when a 5-pound catfish fell from the sky and smacked her square in the face. Lisa Lobree was walking through a city park when she heard a rustling in the trees above her and was struck by the 16-inch fish, which witnesses said was dropped by a passing hawk. Lobree suffered a small cut to the face and a lingering fishy odor. “I smelled so bad afterward,” she said. “I smelled disgusting.” Lobree added that she’s a keen angler, but in decades of fishing, “it was the first catfish that my face caught.”
■ A British carpenter and naturist has been arrested after he shocked his neighbors by renovating his house in the buff. Robert Jenner, 42, has been a naturist since 1999, but his neighbors only discovered his passion when he began fixing the outside of his home while wearing nothing but work boots. After they called police, he was charged with threatening behavior. But not all Jenner’s neighbors are offended by his nude workmanship. “I’ve got a husband, sons, and grandchildren, so maybe that’s why it doesn’t shock me,” said one. “Plus he’s not a bad-looking chap.”
■ A Kansas man allegedly robbed a bank at gunpoint because he preferred being in jail to going home to his wife. Police said that after Larry Ripple, 70, stole nearly $3,000 from a Kansas City branch, he sat down in the bank’s lobby and told a security guard, “I’m the guy you’re looking for.” Police said Ripple confessed that he’d argued with his wife earlier that day, telling her “he’d rather be in jail than at home.” He was charged with bank robbery and released. It’s not known if Ripple returned home to his wife.