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April 9, 2014
Facebook/The Simpsons

Best. News. Ever. In what FX Network president Jon Landgraf is calling "the longest continuous marathon in the history of television," FXX will kick off The Simpsons' long-awaited arrival on cable by airing all 522 syndicated episodes in a row — a feat that will take no less than than 12 days to complete. (Make sure to pick up a few cases of Duff in advance.)

If you don't have enough vacation time to spend 12 consecutive days devouring every episode of The Simpsons, don't worry; within the next few weeks, FXX is also expected to debut a dedicated app that will allow subscribers to stream any Simpsons episode on demand. Obsessively binge-watching The Simpsons: The cause of (and solution to) all life's problems. Scott Meslow

Trump's take
12:43 p.m. ET
FREDERIC J. BROWN/AFP/Getty Images

The media is back at it with its "gotcha" questions, according to Donald Trump, and this time they're from conservative radio host Hugh Hewitt. In a live radio interview Thursday discussing U.S. foreign policy in the Middle East, Hewitt prompted Trump to name the leaders of ISIS, Iran's Quds Force, Hezbollah, the al-Nusra Front, and al Qaeda.

Trump's response: He didn't know — yet. "You know, I'll tell you honestly, I think by the time we get to office, they'll all be changed. They'll all be gone," Trump said in the interview. The Independent notes that Hezbollah has had the "same Secretary General for the past 23 years."

The interview went further downhill when, after Trump mixed up the Quds Force and the Kurds, Hewitt corrected him. Of course, Trump isn't one to admit defeat, so he took to MSNBC's Morning Joe Friday to lash out at Hewitt and call him a "third-rate radio announcer."

"When you say Kurds vs. Quds, I thought he said 'Kurds,'" Trump said. "And it was like 'got you, got you, got you,' and every question is, 'do I know this one, and that one.' You know he worked hard on that."

Hewitt will be partnering with CNN to moderate the second Republican debate. Becca Stanek

Clinton Emails
11:31 a.m. ET

In an interview with Al Jazeera America's Mehdi Hasan, NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden weighed in on former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's use of a private email server while in office.

"Now, this is a problem, because anyone who has the clearances that the secretary of state... knows how classified information should be handled," Snowden said. "And if an ordinary worker at the State Department or the Central Intelligence Agency, or anything like that were sending details about the security of embassies over unclassified email systems, they would not only lose their job and lose their clearance. They would very likely face prosecution for it."

Later in the interview, Snowden also expressed incredulity at Donald Trump's candidacy and labeled Russian President Vladimir Putin an "authoritarian." Watch the full exchange below. Bonnie Kristian

TSAaaarg
11:13 a.m. ET

A Denver CBS station has obtained footage that has been concealed from the public since the incident was caught on camera occurred in February.

Two TSA agents, Ty Spicha and Yasmin Shafi, plotted to manipulate their airport security checkpoint to allow Spicha to fondle male passengers he found attractive. Shafi would tell the body scanner the passenger being screened was female so it detected an irregularity in the genital region. This allowed Spicha to conduct an unjustified pat-down of that area. In the video clip, we see their plan in action:

Another TSA employee reported the plot to superiors. Spicha and Shafi were fired, but no charges were filed. In response to this incident, the TSA has promised more training "in the long run." Bonnie Kristian

Clashing values
10:16 a.m. ET
alexeys/iStock

Kentucky's Rowan County isn't as conservative as this week's hoopla over issuing same-sex marriage licenses may have made it out to be, The Wall Street Journal reports. While the county's elected local clerk, Kim Davis, has rejected same-sex marriage in her refusal to grant marriage licenses, the county's demographics and voting records suggest that not all of Rowan County shares Davis' conservative standings:

Rowan County is classified as a College Town in the American Communities Project, a data analysis project based at American University. It was one of only eight counties in Kentucky that voted for Barack Obama in 2008. In 2013, Morehead, the home of Morehead State, became only the sixth city in Kentucky to extend anti-discrimination protections to LGBT people. [The Wall Street Journal]

However, while Rowan County may have less socially conservative leanings, it is nestled amid counties classified as "Working Class Country counties," which The Wall Street Journal reports are "places that are marked by strong socially conservative attitudes and values." While 56 percent of those in counties classified as College Towns support gay marriage, a 2012 Cooperative Congressional Election Study found that only 36 percent of those in Working Class Country counties do.

The juxtaposition of that conservatism with Rowan County's more liberal leanings might be exactly why tensions between religion and social issues erupted there this week. Read the full analysis of Rowan County over at The Wall Street Journal. Becca Stanek

welcome to the good life
9:45 a.m. ET

Forget Thomas Dewey and Harry S. Truman: There's a new triumphant presidential upset brewing. Just ask The New Yorker:

The cover is for the magazine's Sept. 14 issue, out next week. Start preparing your "President West" playlists accordingly. Kimberly Alters

Presidential polling
9:01 a.m. ET
Richard Ellis/Getty Images

There's one 2016 matchup that Donald Trump doesn't stand a chance at winning, a new Monmouth University poll finds. While The Donald dominates just about everyone else in the Republican field in a head-to-head matchup, he loses to retired neurosurgeon Ben Carson by a whopping 19 percentage points. Faced with the choice of Trump versus Carson, voters chose Carson over Trump, 55 percent to 36 percent.

However, outside of a head-to-head matchup, Trump still leads Carson — and everyone else — by a strong margin in the national polls. The Monmouth University Poll shows Trump in first place with 30 percent of the vote, followed by Carson with 18 percent of the vote. But even if Carson isn't beating Trump in the national polls just yet, Trump had still better watch his back. Carson is quickly gaining traction among Republican voters, with support for him up 5 percent from the last Monmouth poll taken before the Republican debate.

The poll, conducted between August 31 and September 2, has a margin of error of plus or minus 5.1 percentage points. Becca Stanek

Jobs Numbers
8:32 a.m. ET
Justin Sullivan/Getty Images

The American economy added 173,000 jobs in August, the Bureau of Labor Statistics reported on Friday. It's a definite downgrade from the 215,000 initially reported in July, and the 244,000 average of the past year. But on the plus side, both June and July numbers were revised up: from 231,000 to 245,000, and from 215,000 to 245,000, respectively.

On top of that, the unemployment rate dropped to 5.1 percent, while the labor force participation held steady for the third month in a row at 62.6 percent. Average hourly earnings rose 2.2 percent from where they were a year ago.

Analysts were expecting 217,000 new jobs, an unemployment rate of 5.2 percent, and 2.1 percent growth in average hourly earnings.

Earnings growth is still flat compared to what a real recovery would signal, and even at the higher 244,000 average rate of job creation, the hole in the economy will not close until well into 2017. Jeff Spross

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