March 10, 2014

Lena Dunham hosted Saturday Night Live this weekend, but in some ways the star of the show was Russian President Vladimir Putin. Obviously, Putin himself — busy as he is consolidating Russian control of Ukraine's Crimea province — didn't make an appearance. And nobody on the show did their best Putin impersonation. But the Russian leader was the focus of the cold open, when Liam Neeson helped Jay Pharoah's President Obama poke fun at the Republican criticism that Obama just isn't tough enough to go mano a mano against the Russian strongman:

"Weekend Update" also started out with the Crimea situation, with Cecily Strong landing a pretty good joke about Obama and the right side of history. Taran Killam's Matthew McConaughey is nonsensically delightful, but if you want just the Ukraine stuff, skip ahead to about the seven minute mark, when Vanessa Bayer and Fred Armisen talk about what it's like to be Vladimir Putin's best friends growing up. --Peter Weber

4:57 p.m. ET
Ethan Miller/Getty Images

The New York Giants announced Tuesday that they've cut kicker Josh Brown from the team. The announcement followed last week's release of journals, letters, and emails in which Brown admitted he'd been abusive toward his wife, Molly Brown. ABC News reported that in one journal entry, Brown wrote, "I have abused my wife."

The Giants have maintained they did not know about the documents before they were released last Wednesday. "We believed we did the right thing at every juncture of our relationship with Josh," team president John Mara said in statement. "Our beliefs, our judgments, and our decisions were misguided. We accept that responsibility."

In a statement Tuesday, Brown apologized and said he has "never struck his wife, and never would." "I am sorry that my past has called into question the character or integrity of the New York Giants, Mr. Mara, or any of those who have supported me along the way," Brown wrote, promising to tell "more of the pain I had caused and the measures taken to get help so I may be the voice of change and not a statistic."

The NFL placed Brown on the commissioner's exempt list Friday, which meant he couldn't attend practice or games, but could still collect his base salary of $1.15 million. Prior to that, he served a one-game suspension, sitting out the first game of the 2016 season for "violating a protective order against his wife in 2015," Sports Illustrated reported. Though Brown was arrested over that incident, he was not charged.

Brown and his wife have filed for divorce. Becca Stanek

4:20 p.m. ET

In case the thought of Election Day doesn't already fill you with dread, this political ad should do the trick. The apocalyptic spot — created by former Sen. Bill Bradley's (D-N.J.) new super PAC, 52nd Street Fund — reminds the people of Ohio that a Donald Trump presidency could mean the death of a million people. "That's more than all the men, women, and children living in Columbus, Ohio," the ad booms, while a mushroom cloud explodes onscreen.

The cause of death, the ad suggests, would be a nuclear weapon placed within reach of Trump. Watch the imagining of nuclear destruction, below. Becca Stanek

3:55 p.m. ET

With Apple users not yet recovered from the devastating elimination of the headphone jack, Apple has just deleted yet another staple of our modern lives. Photographs of the new MacBook Pros obtained by MacRumors appear to show that Apple has now taken the escape key away from us, too:

RIP ESC. Jeva Lange

3:28 p.m. ET
Paul Morigi/Getty Images

Former Secretary of State Colin Powell announced Tuesday during a luncheon on New York's Long Island that he will be voting for Hillary Clinton in the presidential election. Powell, who served under George W. Bush, said Clinton will serve with "distinction" and cited her "experience and stamina," Newsday's Robert Brodsky reported. Powell said Donald Trump, on the other hand, seems to be "selling people a bill of goods." He also noted the Republican candidate's lack of experience and that he's insulted a "huge swath of people," Brodsky reported.

Powell's announcement comes just one month after his emails bashing the Clinton and her husband were leaked. "I would rather not have to vote for her, although she is a friend I respect," Powell wrote about Clinton in one email dated July 26, 2014, per The Hill. "A 70-year-old person with a long track record, unbridled ambition, greedy, not transformational, with a husband still dicking bimbos at home." Becca Stanek

2:59 p.m. ET

Donald Trump really, really, really hates wind power. How much? Well, Trump has been ranting online about wind farms for even longer than he's been ranting about Hillary Clinton:

Appearing on Herman Cain's morning talk show on WSB on Tuesday, Trump found himself blasting windmills once again, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution reports. "Our energy companies are a disaster right now," Trump explained to Cain, adding, "Wind is very, very expensive, and it only works when it's windy."

"Right," confirmed Cain.

That was hardly the last of it:

Trump: In all fairness, wind is fine. Sometimes you go — I don't know if you've ever been to Palm Springs, California — it looks like a junkyard. They have all these different —

Cain: I have.

Trump: They have all these different companies and each one is made by a different group from, all from China and from Germany, by the way — not from here. And you look at all these windmills. Half of them are broken. They're rusting and rotting. You know, you're driving into Palm Springs, California, and it looks like a poor man's version of Disneyland. It's the worst thing you've ever seen.

And it kills all the birds. I don't know if you know that … Thousands of birds are lying on the ground. And the eagle. You know, certain parts of California — they've killed so many eagles. You know, they put you in jail if you kill an eagle. And yet these windmills [kill] them by the hundreds. [The Herman Cain Show via The Atlanta Journal-Constitution]

You heard the man. Make birds great again — anything short of that would be downright quixotic. Jeva Lange

2:57 p.m. ET
Win McNamee/Getty Images

When talking about his various endorsements in a Tuesday morning interview with local news station WJXT in Jacksonville, Florida, Donald Trump claimed that he'd been "largely" endorsed by the military — "at least conceptually." "We've had tremendous veteran endorsements because the veterans have been treated so unfairly," Trump said.

The claim is questionable on multiple levels — namely, what is a "conceptual" endorsement? It would seem only Trump knows the answer to that.

Then there's the fact that the law explicitly prevents federal agencies from making political endorsements. The Department of Defense has a "set of guidelines that tightly restricts any active duty military or civilian personnel from publicly choosing political sides," NBC News reported, which all but rules out active military members endorsing Trump. Those laws also mean Trump couldn't possibly have that endorsement from U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) that he often boasts about having.

As for retired members, Trump hasn't exactly won them over in droves, either. NBC News reported Trump has gotten an endorsement from about 88 retired military figures; for comparison's sake, Mitt Romney, the 2012 Republican presidential nominee, was endorsed by more than 500 retired military members. Becca Stanek

12:55 p.m. ET

With just a month to go until the premiere date for Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life, we're finally getting our first official glimpse at modern life in Stars Hollow. On Tuesday, Netflix offered up a two-and-a-half minute glimpse into all that awaits our favorite mother-daughter pair in the four-part mini-series, which will be released Nov. 25.

While Lorelai and Rory are still noshing on obscene amounts of junk food, not much else seems to have stayed the same for the Gilmore girls. Lorelai's notoriously stuffy mother Emily is wearing a T-shirt, bookworm Rory is floating around jobless, and Luke and Lorelai are — finally! — in a relationship.

Details about what's up with the rest of the crew — including Sookie, Dean, Jess, Logan, Miss Patty, Lane, and Kirk — are scarce, but the trailer confirmed they all will definitely be making appearances.

Watch the trailer below — and be prepared to start your Thanksgiving countdown now. Becca Stanek

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