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County officials demolish home sold at auction, and more

The Week — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 02:46:21 -0500

County officials demolish home sold at auction
A Pennsylvania man who bought a house at a county auction was surprised to find on his first visit to his new property that the county had demolished it. Real estate investor Billie Joe Sanders purchased the run-down property for only $5,500, figuring he could renovate it and resell it. But county officials tore down the building shortly after selling it to him. “It was rat-infested and the roof had caved in,” says Washington County Recorder of Deeds Debbie Bardella, adding that Sanders is “better off” without the ramshackle...

Teenager brandishes banana in store hold-up, and more

The Week — Thu, 21 May 2009 05:49:01 -0400

Teenager brandishes banana in store hold-up
An ingenious North Carolina teenager allegedly brandished a banana rather than a gun while holding up a store, then tried to eat the evidence. John Szwalla, 17, tried to rob an Internet cafe with the fruit held beneath his T-shirt, but the staff overcame him, say police. Szwalla managed to eat the banana, but failed to eat the peel, which the police duly photographed and took into evidence.

Mel Gibson's anti-stress machine
Mel Gibson has invested in a $100,000 “flow machine” to alleviate stress, says The National Enquirer. The 53-year...

Kenyan man sues organizers of national sex boycott, and more

The Week — Thu, 14 May 2009 04:24:28 -0400

Kenyan man sues organizers of national sex boycott
A Kenyan man is suing the organizers of a national sex boycott, claiming that the protest caused him mental and physical suffering. Women’s groups in Kenya recently called for a weeklong denial of marital relations, to protest a political stalemate in the male-dominated Kenyan government. James Kimondo has filed suit, saying the boycott interfered with his “conjugal rights” and caused him “mental anguish, stress, backaches, and lack of concentration.”

Susan Boyle says no to White House Correspondents’ Association...

Pilot saved by portable toilets, and more

The Week — Thu, 07 May 2009 04:55:21 -0400

Pilot saved by portable toilets
A pilot’s life was saved when his plane crashed into a field of portable toilets. The unnamed 67-year-old had just taken off from the airport in Puyallup, Wash., when the engine of his Cessna failed. Heading back to the runway, the plane struck a fence and crashed upside down in a field of “Honey Bucket” portable restrooms. “The Honey Buckets kind of cushioned things,” said a company official.

Is Madonna "corrupting" Jessica Seinfeld?
Jerry Seinfeld is worried that Madonna is “corrupting” his wife, says The National Enquirer...

Bra's metal underwire deflects bullet, and more

The Week — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 05:52:16 -0400

Bra's metal underwire deflects bullet
A Detroit woman cheated death when she was shot in the chest and the bullet was deflected by the metal underwire of her push-up bra. The unidentified victim, 57, was watching three intruders try to break into her neighbor’s house when one of them shot at her, presumably to eliminate her as a witness. The bullet bounced off the bra, leaving her with a superficial wound. “We need to get some bulletproof vests made from that,” said Detroit Police Sgt. Eren Stephens Bell. “It is some strong wire.”

Britney Spears undergoes “flower...

Mississippi woman survives shot through the head

The Week — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 10:30:07 -0400

Mississippi woman survives shot through the head
A Mississippi woman who had been shot through the head calmly offered arriving police a cup of tea. Tammy Sexton, 47, was shot by her husband, who then turned the gun fatally on himself. When police arrived, Sexton “was holding a rag on her head and talking,” said Sheriff Mike Byrd. “She had made herself some tea and offered the officer something to drink.” Doctors say the bullet somehow passed through a small space between Sexton’s lobes without doing any major damage.

Father of Slumdog Millionaire star tries to sell...

Russian survives two five-story plunges, and more

The Week — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 11:00:37 -0400

Russian survives two five-story plunges
A Russian man who downed three bottles of vodka survived a five-story plunge—twice. After his drinking binge, Alexei Roskov, 22, jumped out his kitchen window. Somehow, he survived the 50-foot fall and staggered back upstairs, where his wife berated him for being an idiot. Roskov then tried to kill himself again. “When I heard my wife screaming at me,” he said, “I thought it was best if I left the room again—out of the window.” After medics treated him for bruises, Roskov announced he’d decided to give up drinking...

Colorado man coughs up 1-inch nail, and more

The Week — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 04:44:48 -0400

Colorado man coughs up 1-inch nail
A Colorado man who was having an MRI suddenly felt a sharp pain in his nose, and coughed up a 1-inch nail that had been embedded in his head for 30 years. Prax Sanchez, 72, a retired carpenter, had no idea the nail was there, but felt something move inside his head when the magnetic imaging device exerted a pull on the metal. Minutes later, he coughed, and the nail popped into his hand. “I couldn’t believe it,” said Sanchez. “I never had any idea there was any metal in my face.”

Ringo Starr's surprising admission
Ringo Starr apparently...

The dumbest guy in Pennsylvania, and more

The Week — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 06:55:38 -0400

The dumbest guy in Pennsylvania
A Pennsylvania man allegedly tried to rob a retired police chief at a convention of police officers—and was, not surprisingly, arrested. Former Chief John Comparetto, 56, had just emerged from a men’s room stall when Jerome Blanchett, 19, brandished a gun and demanded cash, police said. Blanchett was promptly swarmed by roughly a dozen of the 300 narcotics cops at the conference. “He actually walked past a great big poster that said, ‘WELCOME NARCOTICS OFFICERS,’” said Comparetto. “This is probably the dumbest guy in the state...

The 60-foot phallus on the roof

The Week — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 11:06:00 -0400

“Talk about overcompensating,” said The Inquisitr. A British teen painted a 60-foot phallus on the roof of his family’s new mansion, hoping people would be able to spot it using Google Earth. The gag went unnoticed for a year, when a helicopter pilot saw it and told the Sun newspaper.

So, of course, reporters felt compelled to tell on the artist, 18-year-old Rory McInnes, said The Irish Times. Rory's father heard the news and responded, "It's an April fool's joke, right? There's no 60-foot phallus on top of my house."

The young artist escaped justice, for now, said Huliq News. Young...

Time capsule ends up as garbage can, and more

The Week — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 10:12:29 -0400

Time capsule ends up as garbage can
Santa Fe officials have figured out why they couldn’t find the 50-year-old time capsule due to be opened in 2010: The capsule was never buried. A local newspaper has revealed that Santa Fe’s former mayor quietly gave up on the time capsule in 1960, when the city ran short of money. “Those were days of confusion, days of chaos,” the former mayor said. The capsule, a 150-pound iron tube, wound up being used as a garbage can in an office-supply store.

$43 million prenuptial is insufficient
A Swedish countess has asked a judge to negate...

Venomous spider bite cures paraplegic

The Week — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 10:14:19 -0400

Venomous spider bite cures paraplegic
A California paraplegic who used a wheelchair for 20 years recovered his ability to walk after he was bitten by a spider. David Blancarte, 48, was recently bitten by a venomous Brown Recluse spider and sent to an emergency room. A nurse noticed a muscle spasm in his paralyzed leg and tested him with an electric current. “I yelled,” he says. Five days later, Blancarte was walking. Doctors say they’re mystified.

Joaquin Phoenix wrestles with heckler
Joaquin Phoenix, the actor-turned-rapper, engaged in a profanity-laced argument with a heckler...

Georgia inmate sneaks back into jail, and more

The Week — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 10:05:42 -0400

Georgia inmate sneaks back into jail
An inmate was apprehended last week while breaking into a Georgia jail. Harry Jackson, 25, was caught sneaking into the Camden County jail with 14 cartons of cigarettes he had just stolen from a local convenience store. “We thought we had two separate incidents,” said Sheriff Tommy Gregory, referring to Jackson’s original escape and the burglary at Snappy Foods. “By the time we locate this guy, he’s one and the same.”

John Edwards finally confesses
John Edwards has finally confessed to wife Elizabeth that he fathered a child...

Beau hides engagement ring in a milkshake, and more

The Week — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 10:34:17 -0500

Beau hides engagement ring in a milkshake
A New Mexico woman accidentally swallowed her engagement ring after her boyfriend hid it in her milkshake as part of his proposal plan. After Kaitlin Whipple gulped down the entire drink, her beau, Reed Harris, realized she had not felt the ring in her mouth, as he assumed she would. They rushed to the emergency room, where an X-ray revealed the ring sitting in her stomach. It was eventually recovered, says Whipple, after friends “stocked me up on fiber and prune juice and everything we could think of.”

Madonna's It moments
Someone has anonymously...

Burglars foiled when getaway van is stolen, and more

The Week — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 10:51:17 -0500

Burglars foiled when getaway van is stolen
A Washington state man turned the tables on burglars who were ransacking his home by stealing their getaway van. Patrick Rosario peeked through a door to see several men unhooking his flat-screen TV. He sneaked out the back door, jumped into the van he found idling in the driveway, and drove off. Police later found the burglars’ loot sitting by Rosario’s back door, indicating that they fled on foot when they realized the van was gone. “I wish I could have seen the look on their faces,” Rosario said.

Is Michael Jackson dying from...

Bitten by a poisonous snake at Wal-Mart, and more

The Week — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 06:33:20 -0500

Bitten by a poisonous snake at Wal-Mart
A Florida man is suing Wal-Mart after he was allegedly bitten by a poisonous snake in the lawn and garden section. Jay Richitelli, 42, was looking through some plants when he felt a sudden pain “like fire going through my arm.” A juvenile pygmy rattlesnake had clamped its jaws to his hand. Richitelli dislodged the snake and stomped it to death, but he says the venom caused hallucinations and lung damage. Nonetheless, Richitelli says he’ll keep shopping at Wal-Mart, as “they’ve got certain stuff where you can’t beat their...