Jennifer Lopez has always craved attention, says Judith Newman in Allure. When she was growing up in the Bronx, the 40-year-old diva did everything she could to keep everyone’s eyes focused on her. “I was always in gymnastics and winning medals, or in track winning trophies, or softball, or in shows as one of the top five girls. I was always getting noticed. And I liked it. I liked it.” But it wasn’t narcissism that drove her to seek the spotlight, she insists. Rather, it was a need to be loved and wanted by her frequently absent father. “I don’t want to get all psychological and in a therapy session, but my dad worked nights and slept during the day, so we never saw him much. When I was 5 or 6, I would lie in bed at night and tell myself, over and over, ‘I know my daddy loves me.’ Yet there was this kind of thing where I wondered about it … if because of his absence he didn’t care about me or about us. Believe me, my dad was the best. He was a wonderful, loving father—still is, to this day; he still calls and says, ‘How’s my little baby? How’s my gorgeous?’ But these little things happen to you when you’re younger.”