It must be true... I read it in the tabloids
▪ A North Carolina woman claims to have invented a bottled scent that will attract any bigfoot within 1.5 miles of the wearer. Allie Megan Webb, who runs a body care store and is married to a man who belongs to a group that hunts for the legendary creature, says her husband was wearing the $7 “woodsy” Bigfoot Juice scent in August, when he claimed to have spotted a hairy, bipedal beast in the backwoods. “That’s enough to say it can attract a bigfoot,” said Webb.
▪ A British man took revenge on the strangers who stole the parking spot outside his home by completely covering their car in plastic wrap. Neil Junglas saw the car pull up and a couple get out with suitcases before jumping in a taxi. The pair likely wanted to avoid paying for parking at the nearby airport, but their cost-cutting move left Junglas without a parking spot for days. To get even, he bought an industrial roll of plastic wrap and used it to tightly swaddle the car—sealing the doors, windows and wheels. “I thought I’d leave them a nice surprise,” Junglas said, “for when they got back.”
▪ Charmin is offering Colorado Springs’ “mad pooper” a year’s supply of free toilet paper if the serial fecal offender turns herself in to authorities. Police have spent all summer hunting for the mystery pooper—a female jogger who routinely defecates outside homes. Photos taken by locals of the elusive excreter have gone viral online, and last week Charmin joined in the social media fervor by promising the jogger a year’s worth of T P if she surrenders. The company tweeted that it hoped the bathroom supplies would help with the mad pooper’s “runs.”