President Trump temporarily dropped his ongoing feud with the “fake news” media for a night of fun at this year’s Gridiron Club and Foundation’s spring dinner, firing off a series of jokes in front of a room full of journalists. Trump started by apologizing for being late; “Jared could not get through security,” he explained, referring to his son-in-law, Jared Kushner, whose White House security clearance was just downgraded. He said that his “apprentice,” Vice President Mike Pence, constantly asks, “Has he been impeached yet?” In perhaps the darkest joke of the evening, Trump alluded to the White House staff turnover and rumors that first lady Melania Trump is furious about his alleged infidelity. “Who is going to be the next to leave?” the president asked. “Steve Miller or Melania?” When the audience gasped, Trump turned to Melania and said, “You love me, right?”
O.J. Simpson claims that if he did murder ex-wife Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman, then he had an accomplice, according to a 2006 interview airing on March 11. The former NFL star made the comments in a conversation about his bizarre book If I Did It—during which Simpson muses hypothetically about how he would have carried out the 1994 murders. Fox canceled the earlier showing of the interview after a widespread outcry. Now, in what’s being promoted as his “Lost Confession,” says TMZ.com, Simpson claims he’d gone with a friend to Brown’s house to “scare the s--- out of her”—carrying a knife for dramatic effect—when Ron Goldman, a waiter she had just met, showed up. Simpson says he began screaming in rage and then blacked out; when he regained consciousness, he was covered in blood.
Keith Richards has apologized to Mick Jagger after publicly suggesting that his geriatric bandmate should get a vasectomy. The Rolling Stones rocker made the comments a year after Jagger, 74, welcomed his eighth child, this one with 31-year-old Melanie Hamrick. “Mick’s a randy old bastard,” Richards, 74, told The Wall Street Journal. “It’s time for the snip—you can’t be a father at that age. Those poor kids!” Richards later tweeted that he “deeply” regretted the comments.