Good week/bad week
Good week for:
Castelvetro, Italy, where for three hours red wine flowed from domestic faucets, following a malfunction at a local winery. “At a time where we have very little to smile about, I’m glad we brought some levity to others,” said Deputy Mayor Giorgia Mezzacqui, whose town is near the epicenter of Italy’s coronavirus outbreak.
Automation, with the news that the Lehigh, Pa., YMCA is installing a robot lifeguard at its swimming pool that uses artificial intelligence to detect if a swimmer is at risk of drowning. The device issues a high-pitched alert if it “sees” someone in trouble.
Legacy media, after the Australian newspaper NT News printed a special edition with eight blank pages for use as toilet paper, currently in short supply due to coronavirus-inspired hoarding.
Bad week for:
Contrition, after former President Bill Clinton explained in an upcoming documentary on Hillary Clinton that he began his affair with Monica Lewinsky as a way “to manage my anxieties.”
Home remedies, after the French government was forced to debunk an online rumor that snorting cocaine “kills” the coronavirus. Actually, said the French health ministry, cocaine is “an addictive drug that causes serious side effects.”
Spiking the football, after Maisie, a wire-haired dachshund who won Best in Show at Britain’s Crufts dog show, paused during her victory lap to defecate on the show-ring floor. “It’s something you dream of and you don’t ever think will happen,” said Maisie’s owner, Kim McCalmont, referring to the first of those events.