Just 72 days after their astoundingly expensive "wedding of the century" — and only weeks after E! aired a drama-fraught wedding TV special — newlyweds Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries are getting divorced. Many viewers of the E! special won't be terribly surprised by this news, as Humphries and Kardashian spent a whole lot of time bickering and expressing mild disdain for each other. Commentators, of course, are reacting to the "unsurprising" divorce news the only way they know how: With snark. Here, the best jokes:
A new currency is born
The cost of the Kardashian-Humphries wedding was an incredible $10 million, says Anna North at Jezebel, which will be "henceforth referred to as 1 Kardashian." Kim's sister Khloe's wedding? That only cost $1 million — "or 0.1 Kardashian."
Not right for the part
It's pretty clear what really went wrong, says Maureen O'Connor at Gawker. Humphries was just "poorly cast" in the starring role as Kim's husband.
On the rebound
"With no NBA season, the only point of having an NBA Draft this year is to find Kim Kardashian husbands," tweeted TV host Damien Fahey.
Was anyone shocked?
If you believed this marriage was "ending in forever after," says Katey Rich at Cinema Blend, "then you're probably the sucker born every minute that P.T. Barnum got so excited about."
It's the athlete curse
If Kim and Kris had "double-majored in celebritology and sportsology," they would have known that their union was doomed from the start, says Cindy Boren at The Washington Post. "Call it the Monroe-DiMaggio rule." From Halle Berry and David Justice to Carmen Electra and Dennis Rodman, marriages between celebrities and athletes are notoriously brief. Now, all "hope rests with David and Victoria Beckham."
The case for gay marriage
This quickie divorce makes Kardashian the "instant poster girl for gay marriage," says Tim Molloy at The Wrap. Same-sex marriage advocates should be quick to point out that "she was allowed to make a joke of the institution while many gay couples who want lifelong marriages still aren't allowed to wed."
Ever the opportunists
It should be noted that Kim's mom Kris Jenner, "ever the businesswoman," has a new memoir hitting stores just one day after the divorce news broke, says The Huffington Post. "Coincidence? You decide."
THE WEEK'S AUDIOPHILE PODCASTS: LISTEN SMARTER
- 13 Urban Outfitters controversies
- 43 TV shows to watch in 2014
- This is how the U.S. thinks China could invade Taiwan
- 6 things the happiest families all have in common
- The science of sex: 4 harsh truths about dating and mating
- Why you should stop believing in evolution
- Can we lead spiritually fulfilling lives without religion?
- Surviving a plane crash
- Confessions of a hotel insider
- Obama knows he can't really 'defeat' ISIS. Americans need to wake up to that reality, too.
Subscribe to the Week