1. Seth MacFarlane responds to 'Hitler joke' controversy
While announcing the nominees for the Academy Awards on Thursday, Oscar host Seth MacFarlane demonstrated the razor-sharp wit that has made his Family Guy a favorite of 14-year-old boys across the nation. MacFarlane quipped that Best Picture nominee Amour — which was co-produced by Germany and Austria — was the two countries' first collaboration since Adolf Hitler. CBS News reports that MacFarlane doubled down in the face of critcism, tweeting, "Lotta flap over that Adolf joke. Look, Amour was a great film, so how about this: Austria, we'll give you the Oscar if you take back Arnold." Austria has yet to respond.

2. Taylor Swift is back in the studio recording inevitable Harry Styles breakup song
Descending into full-blown self-parody, Taylor Swift is allegedly mourning her breakup from One Direction's Harry Styles the only way she knows how: By writing yet another breakup anthem. MTV News reports that Swift tweeted "Back in the studio. Uh oh…" on Thursday, with the "uh oh" presumably intended as a preemptive warning to both Styles and music critics who will soon be forced to review another song about someone Swift will never (ever ever ever ever) get back together with.

3. Critic's Choice Awards misspell name of Critics' Choice Award winner Anne Hathaway
Pro tip to anyone who plans to give Anne Hathaway a trophy for her performance in Les Miserables (and really, who doesn't?): Make sure to spell her name right. Us Weekly reports that the actress' acceptance speech at the 2013 Critics' Choice Awards on Thursday was dominated by her understandable disappointment that her name had been misspelled. "This is a bittersweet moment for me because I have this award, but you spelled my name wrong," said Hathaway. "It is with an 'e.'" Consider yourselves on notice.

4. You can get married at Downton Abbey
Attention, rich people: You may not be a Crawley, but you — yes, you — can get married at Downton Abbey for a weirdly specific $24,069 (not including tax). People reports that diehard Downton fans can rent out the Victorian Library at Highclere Castle in Newbury, U.K., where Downton Abbey is filmed, to "play Mary and Matthew in front of family and friends" — because there's nothing more romantic than a wedding where the bride and groom are already pretending to be marrying totally different people. 

5. Quvenzhane Wallis doesn't know what the Oscars are
Your Friday palate cleanser: Beasts of the Southern Wild's 9-year-old star Quvenzhane Wallis, who recently became the youngest actress to be nominated for Best Actress at the Academy Awards, doesn't really understand what it means to be nominated for an Oscar. "I was like, 'Who's Oscar? I don't know Oscar," says Wallis, adding that she hopes to meet "everyone from the Disney Channel and Nickelodeon, but not Nick at Nite" at the Oscar ceremony — so keep your distance, Ron Howard.