1. The sneakiest yearbook quote ever
To the untrained eye, Garfield High School senior Jessica Lee's yearbook quote is a random garble of chemistry nerditry. That is, until you assign the listed elements their periodic symbols:

(F) flourine (U) uranium (C) carbon (K) potassium (Bi) bismuth (Tc) technetium (He) helium (S) sulfur (Ge) germanium (Tm) thulium (O) oxygen (Ne) neon (Y) yttrium

Yes, Lee managed to sneak some decidedly NSFW Biggie Smalls lyrics into her high school yearbook. Get money. (Via Angry Asian Man)

2. The preteen metal band from Brooklyn
The three members of Rocking the Truth are all 12 years old, and hail from Flatbush, Brooklyn — an area not exactly known for being the heavy metal capital of America. The trio star in a short online documentary by The Avant/Garde Diaries, where they open up about being bullied by their peers, and their dream of touring the country. They also happen to possess a scary amount of talent for sixth graders. (Via Reddit)

3. Tumblr of the Week: Jony Ive redesigns things
What would happen if Apple's chief designer imposed his sensibilities on other famous brands?

4. The worst cargo-loader ever
This was allegedly taken from a plane waiting at an airport in China. (Via Uproxx)

And here it is again in GIF form, just because:

5. Alabama's all-male cheerleading squad
The Prancing Elites hail from Mobile, Ala., and they're kind of amazing. My favorite part is how they sit down at the end like nothing happened. (Via Colorlines)

6. The Wu-Tang Clan's ASL interpreter
At the Bonnaroo Music and Arts Festival last weekend, an ASL interpreter named Holly stole the show — and she didn't sing a single word. Here, she's getting down signing for the science geeks in the Wu-Tang Clan. What's "dang, girrrrl" in sign language? (Via Now This News)

7. Chris Bosh wins championship, eats confetti