Whatever You Say
March 17, 2014

Apparently not so thrilled with the United States' condemnation of Russia's decision to seize control of the Crimean peninsula via an election, a news anchor on the state-backed news network Russia 1 reminded viewers Sunday night that Russia is "the only country in the world capable of turning the U.S.A. into radioactive dust."

The comments came from Dmitry K. Kiselyov, an anchor who was handpicked by his friend Vladimir Putin to manage Russia Today. Kiselyov's words were matched a with a radioactive plume exploding on a gigantic screen behind him. The firebrand rhetoric is not out of the ordinary for Kiselyov, who's well known for his "mad as hell" diatribes, but it still "stunned" viewers.

Watch the clip, which is in Russian, below — because you don't need a translator to pick up on Kiselyov's anger. --Jordan Valinsky

Upsets
6:32 a.m. ET
CC by: Dave Cournoyer

The CBC calls Tuesday's provincial elections in Alberta a "massive shock that turns Canadian politics on its head." When the ruling Progressive Conservative government called the election a year ago, the party had 70 of the Alberta legislature's 87 seats, and in December the Progressive Conservatives celebrated 43 years in control of Alberta, a record for any party in any Canadian province.

On Tuesday, the leftist New Democratic Party crushed them, winning 53 seats and pushing the Conservatives to an embarrassing third-place finish, 11 seats, behind the further-right Wild Rose Party, with 21 seats. This is not only surprising because conservative, oil-rich Alberta "has long been cast as the Texas of Canada," as The New York Times notes, but also because it is the home and political base of Prime Minister Stephen Harper.

"I think we might have made a little bit of history tonight," said NDP leader Rachel Notley on Tuesday night. She will be the next premier, with the Wild Rose Party assuming the role of official opposition. Outgoing Premier Jim Prentice resigned as party leader and member of the provincial legislature, announcing that his "contribution to public life is now at an end." Political analysts attributed the Conservatives' sharp turn in fortunes to budget deficits brought on by falling oil prices, political missteps, and shifting demographics. Peter Weber

campaign 2016
5:38 a.m. ET

Newly official Republican presidential candidate Carly Fiorina was on Tuesday's Late Night, and along with amusingly informing Seth Meyers that she just purchased the domain name SethMeyers.org (well-played, Fiorina), she acknowledged that she believes climate change is caused by humans. "I'm prepared to take the scientists at their word," she said, "but the problem is we never finish the scientists' sentence.... A single nation acting alone can make no difference at all."

Lest you think Fiorina is backing President Obama's push to enact an enforceable global pact on reducing greenhouse-gas emissions or cheering his landmark deals with China and India, fear not. "Why would we destroy all these jobs with regulation when the answer to climate change is innovation, not regulation?" she asked. There follows a short but interesting conversation on when and how the U.S. can and should lead in the world, and then Fiorina changes the subject to Russian President Vladimir Putin, who is both "a bad dude" and funny. —Peter Weber

ISIS
4:44 a.m. ET
Ben Torres/Getty Images

Islamic State appears to have taken credit for the attack on a cartoon-drawing contest in the Dallas suburb of Garland on Sunday, calling gunmen Elton Simpson and Nadir Soofi "soldiers of the caliphate." Simpson had been interacting with ISIS figures on Twitter, the FBI says, but intelligence analysts are skeptical that ISIS ordered the attack. It's likely the attack was less directed by ISIS than "inspired by them," says Rep. Michael McCaul (R-Texas), chairman of the House Homeland Security Committee, citing intelligence officials.

That's not necessarily something to be happy about. "ISIS and its caliphate is becoming a brand, looser even than a network like Al Qaeda," Omer Taspinar, an expert on political Islam at the Brookings Institution, tells The New York Times. "It's a kind of spiritual belonging. Claiming credit does not necessarily indicate any kind of organizational link." That suggests more lone-wolf ambushes like the Garland one and fewer big operations like the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks.

Unlike Al Qaeda, says terrorism scholar J. M. Berger, ISIS "can retroactively ratify attacks that they like and ignore those that don't serve its purpose." In that sense, the Garland attack is an odd one to try and own: Despite firing assault rifles, wearing bulletproof vests, and having the element of surprise, Simpson and Soofi were apparently shot dead by a traffic cop with a pistol, after incurring only one minor injury. Peter Weber

The Daily Showdown
4:01 a.m. ET

"There are so many hopefuls in the Republican race, we've got to start narrowing the field," Jon Stewart said on Tuesday's Daily Show. He had a helpful suggestion, too. "Let's do it with a game I call 'Let's Get Rid of Ted Cruz.'" The game show isn't just out of personal or policy animus, Stewart insisted. It's that "Ted Cruz cannot live up to the extremely high standards set for a candidate by... Ted Cruz.” Over the next 5 minutes, Stewart laid out his case, using Cruz's words against him, Daily Show–style. Surely, um, Republican primary voters will be persuaded. —Peter Weber

last night on late night
3:47 a.m. ET

The star of Sunday's Met Gala — a fundraiser for New York's Metropolitan Museum of Art's costume wing — was probably Rihanna, with her elaborate yellow dress designed by China's Guo Pei. After providing some unabashedly snarky color commentary on the Met Gala fashion choices of various celebrities, Jimmy Kimmel got down to business on Tuesday night's show: poking fun at Rihanna's gown. (Maybe he's still sore about being woken up at midnight?)

Kimmel said that although designers spend so much time making these dresses — Rihanna's took two years — they never capitalize on that by selling them to the public. Until now. "One thing about the Chinese, they know how to get products made and onto the shelf here in America," he said, setting up a faux late-nite infomercial for the "Rihanket," and also a much smaller product inspired by Kim Kardashian's dress. You won't believe all the amazing things you can do with your Rihanket! Watch below. —Peter Weber

Special Elections
2:08 a.m. ET
Facebook/DanDonovanS

The voters of Staten Island and part of Brooklyn have elected District Attorney Daniel Donovan Jr. (R) to fill the U.S. House seat vacated by Michael Grimm (R), who resigned after pleading guilty to federal tax-fraud changes. Donovan is best known nationally for not convincing a grand jury to indict the officers caught on video choking Eric Garner, who subsequently died.

Donovan easily beat Councilman Vincent Gentile (D), 60 percent to 39 percent, according to unofficial results, in the rare Republican-leaning district of New York City. The victorious DA still touted his win as a "message to President Obama, to Nancy Pelosi and, yes, even to Bill de Blasio, that their policies are wrong for our nation." National Democrats, after sinking millions into an unsuccessful 2014 attempt to unseat Grimm (R) — then under federal indictment but before he pleaded guilty — declined to support Gentile in this special election. Peter Weber

boy are her fingers tired
2:04 a.m. ET

The extravagant yellow ensemble Rihanna wore to the Met Gala on Monday that ended up spawning multiple memes was two years in the making.

The singer told Vogue's André Leon Talley that "it was a miracle" how the Guo Pei-designed dress was put together. "I saw this beautiful beast on the internet," she said. "I was researching Chinese couture.... It's so well-made. It's handmade by one Chinese woman. It took two years to make this." Get a closer look at the elaborate get-up in the video below. —Catherine Garcia

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