The Week contest - Animal revenge

Welcome to The Week's "What Next?" contest, an invitation to test your powers of imagination with challenges inspired by current events.

Click here for the results of the previous contest: Accounting songs

Last week's question: Two Texas deer hunters were attacked by an apparently revenge-minded buck, which charged into them, chased them into their truck as they tried to flee, and ate their cigarettes. In the form of a succinct headline, please imagine the next instance of animal revenge on humankind.

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RESULTS:

THE WINNER: Coroner Finds Bread in Turkey Farmer’s Rectum

John Parry, Laurel, MD

SECOND PLACE: Reindeer Charge Santa $25 Per Carry-on Bag

Janine Witte, New Hope, PA

THIRD PLACE: Cat Uploads Embarrassing Video of Owner

Brendan Leyden, Lomita, CA

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Lassie Lets Timmy Drown

Ken Kellam III, Dallas, TX

Bald Eagles Attack Congressmen

Paul Hlavac, Lake Bluff, IL

Whale Sinks Japanese Armada

Michael J. Steinhauer, Madison, WI

Cat on Diet Overturns, Raids Fridge

Stephanie Sarich, Minnetonka, MN

Irradiated Fly Pulls Arms Off Local Teen

Stephen Dudzik, Olney, MD

Dolphin Laughs as Blindfolded Trainer Unable to Find Beach Ball

Charles & Mary Parry, Catonsville, MD

Lemmings Lead U.S. Over Fiscal Cliff

Dallas Lea, Poughkeepsie, NY

Guerrilla Gorilla: Poacher Takes a Pounding

Kathy El-Assal, Middleton, WI

Elephant Squeezes Trainer into Trunk

Richard W. Lee, West lawn, PA

Squirrels Eat Hunter's Nuts

Bill Skeat, Athens, WV

Pigs Wrap Diners in a Blanket

Raj Salgia, Wheaton, IL

Mouse Elected Mayor of Orlando

Steve Fry, Bedford, NH

Sore Boar Gores Four

Raymond Smith, Lynn, MA

Chicken Refuses to Cross Road

Scott Seager, Kalispell, MT

Bass Kicks Ass in Lake Brawl

Ned Steadman, Brevard, NC

Duck Hunters Victims of Fowl Play

Jason Danielian, Homewood, IL

White House Parrot Tells All

Ivan Kerschner, Salem, SC

Two Children Trapped in Plastic Bag by Angry Goldfish

Michael Curran-Levett, Pacifica, CA

Snails Threaten Slowdown

Louis Phillips, New York, NY

Bambi Blasts Back

Dick Miller, Rochester, NY

Pigs Retaliate: Food Poisoning, Ineffective Antibiotics

Kristi Fredrickson, Salinas, CA

Raccoons Trash Davy Crockett Birthplace

Kenneth R. Updegrove, Cedaredge, CO

World's Tuna Pledge to Accumulate as Much Mercury as Possible; Taunt “Eat Us & See What Happens”

Tim Lanter, Alexandria, KY