The Week contest - A tortoise's last words
A mated pair of Galapagos giant tortoises together for 115 years at an Austrian zoo had a vicious fight and are no longer on speaking terms. What do you suppose was the last sentence one of them said to the other?
Welcome to The Week's "What Next?" contest, an invitation to test your powers of imagination with challenges inspired by current events.
Last week's question: After 115 years together, Bibi and Poldi — a mated pair of Galapagos giant tortoises at an Austrian zoo — had a vicious fight and are no longer on speaking terms. We asked what you supposed was the last sentence one of them said to the other?
THE WINNER: I cheered for the hare.
Reebs Peterson, Moline, IL
SECOND PLACE: Yeah, that outfit makes you look fat.
P.J. Hartley, Boone, NC
THIRD PLACE: Just so you know, you taste like chicken.
Jordan Shin, Eugene, OR
Wow! Your 90 year old sister looks hot!
Rob Phillips, Moore, OK
Call me when your butt fits into your shell again.
Angela James, Westminster, MD
Tell me the truth. Was it the pool guy?
Howard Rosen, Philadelphia, PA
I'm going home to Mother!
Carla Holtz, Stanardsville, VA
115 years and you still can't remember our anniversary?
James Stein, Holmdel, NJ
My zookeeper will call your zookeeper.
Matthew Furstenfeld, Fullerton, CA
You couldn't just keep it in your shell.
Beth Palmer, Santa Barbara, CA
I'm just not ready for a long-term commitment.
John Besnard, Irvine, CA
This is getting old.
Alexander Herlihy, New York, NY
Your new glasses were my brother.
Michael Berkley, Tempe, AZ
I gave you the best 115 years of my life.
Gwenda Wobbe, Annapolis, MD
I've been telling you since 1897 – she's just a friend!
Dick LaVine, New York, NY
This is what we get for rushing into marriage.
Paul Witte, New Hope, PA
Since you asked, yes I've been faking it for the last 115 years.
Robert C. Herman, Sun City, AZ
Did you just shush me?
Rose M. Wright, Troy, MI
We'll always have Galapagos.
William E. Farris, Santa Ana, CA
It may be constitutional, but it's a tax.
Mark Gibson, San Antonio, TX
Go lie on your back.
Robert M. Dobier, West Hollywood, CA
The honeymoon is over!
M. Fiona Neary, Fredericksburg, VA
I hate spaghetti night.
Patrick Phillips, Canandaigua, NY
Sorry, I'm looking for a long-term relationship.
Jason Prusaczyk, Farmington, CT
I hate the way you chew your lettuce.
Connie Inglish, Glendale, AZ
I don't care if high school was 97 years ago, you shouldn't have friended her.
Bob Welch, Minnetonka, MN
Your shell doesn't look that great either!
Mary Thiessen, Sun Valley, ID
Did you touch my drums?
Timothy O'Brien, Girard, OH
I should've just kept walking.
Donna Stewart, Craig, CO
Well that's a century of my life I'll never get back.
Jeff Galli, Reno, NV
I get the house.
Vince Dellavalle, Wayne, PA
Why don't you order your own head of lettuce instead of always taking a bite of mine?
Roger Collins, Seneca, SC
When are you going to grow up?
Robert N. Davis, Willis, TX
You may have won the race, but he makes me happy!
Rick Sims, Bloomington, IL
It's not a tax, it's a penalty.
Amy Douglass, Sycamore, IL
Whatever you say is fine by me — I quit listening a hundred years ago.
Valerie Fazio, Louisville, KY
You've had a headache for 114 years!
Sarah Jane Woodall, Las Vegas, NV
You've talked for the last 115 years. Can I talk now?
Rafael Diez, Peterborough, NH
"I beat the rabbit, I beat the rabbit." How many times do I have to hear that story?
Wayne Holm, Seattle, WA
Live and learn.
Marian Kantor, West Bloomfield, MI
Todd Talkington, Round Rock, TX