How Neil Patrick Harris came out to himself

Appearing in a production of Rent was a "cathartic" moment, and helped Harris "put to rest" some of his "weird personal concerns."

Neil Patrick Harris was very slow to accept his homosexuality, says Emily Nussbaum in New York. Two decades ago, when he was the celebrated teenage star of the TV series Doogie Howser, M.D., Harris tried to ignore his attraction to men. “There were gay adults in L.A., and that kind of made me panic a bit. That was kind of the elephant in the room: some sort of horrible inevitability. And I tried many different angles to head in a different direction. Dating different girls, being the funny, witty guy at the party, to avoid being the sexual being.” Then, when he was 25, he appeared in a production of Rent. It inspired him. “This gypsy world of people who are just so appreciative of each other’s individuality! Where some people are supergay or are straight and have a wife but they’re okay with gay men giving them foot massages.” He saw kindred spirits in the audience, too. “You can see young couples, old-guy couples, clutching each other, openly sobbing. It’s very cathartic. And it certainly put to rest my weird personal concerns.” So after some soul-searching, Harris slowly came out to friends, associates, and finally his parents. He came out publicly in 2006—when he was 33. “I was a late bloomer.”

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