My mother was my doula — and it was the best parenting choice I made

She was exactly who I needed in the delivery room

Newborn
(Image credit: Mike Kemp/Tetra Images/Corbis)

My parent cohorts in New York take the job of bringing up kids extremely seriously. I respect that. They want to get everything right, so they read furiously and employ experts. What most don't do is ask their mothers to lend a hand.

I can't help but feel that there's something amiss here: a generation of affluent, educated procreators who favor paid-for expertise over the love, support, and advice of their own family. Of course, many new parents do not, for one reason or another, have a close mother, aunt, or sister to call on, and that must be a horrible, lonely situation. I'm not sure I'd have braved making babies without an extended family in the picture.

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Ruth Margolis
Ruth ​Margolis is a British ​journalist living in the U.S. Her work has appeared in ​The Guardian, ​The ​Daily Telegraph and BBCAmerica.com.