Speed Reads

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Tim Lincecum stole your uncle's awkward mustache

San Francisco Giants pitcher Tim Lincecum has, statistically, looked nothing like his former Cy Young-winning self of late. Now, he literally doesn't look like his old self either.

Behold, Lincecum's new 'stache:

(Christian Petersen / Getty)

Wow. Maybe it looks better up close.

(Christian Petersen / Getty)

Nope, still terrible. At least Derek Holland's wispy "mustache" now has some competition.