The Golden Globes ceremony is less remarkable for the integrity of its awards than for the brazen spectacle that occurs when a bunch of celebrities spend three hours drunkenly celebrating themselves. The annual show is a reliable home for some of the most surprising, off-the-cuff remarks on the awards circuit, and last night didn't disappoint. Which celebrities kept the censors on high alert? Watch for yourself:
1. Jacqueline Bisset
Things got off to a rough start as Jacqueline Bisset kicked off the evening with a fleeting expletive that managed to evade the censors. After a genuinely shocked Bisset managed the 30-minute walk from the nosebleed seats to the stage to collect her trophy for Dancing on the Edge, she made several rambling attempts to begin her speech before composing herself.
"I am sorry, but I am going to get this together," said Bisset. "I want to thank people who have given me joy, and there have been many. And the people who have given me shit, I say like my mother — what did she say? She used to say, 'Go to hell and don't come back!'" The censor somehow managed to cut off everything immediately before the curse word, and the sound came back in just in time to hear Bisset say "shit" on live TV.
2. Elisabeth Moss
Having learned from the Jacqueline Bisset debacle, the censors were primed for the other speeches (though Aaron Paul managed to slip in a "Yeah, bitch!" at the tail end of Breaking Bad creator Vince Gilligan's acceptance speech for Best Drama). Their next major challenge came when Elisabeth Moss accepted the Best Actress in a Miniseries or TV Movie for Sundance Channel's Top of the Lake. "Holy shit," she said — muted, but easy for any viewer to catch.
Moss was on a roll; while on the red carpet earlier in the evening, she gave E!'s inane Mani-Cam the finger:
3. Diane Keaton
As usual, Woody Allen opted out of the awards show circuit, which meant that friend and longtime costar Diane Keaton was on hand to accept his Cecil B. DeMille Lifetime Achievement Award.
"If Woody saw this, he'd say, 'Get the hook and get her off the goddamn stage,'" said Keaton. That was enough to trigger censors: Her entire next sentence was censored, and not even The Week's crack team of lip-readers could figure out what she said. Give it a try for yourself (and leave your best guess in the comments):
THE WEEK'S AUDIOPHILE PODCASTS: LISTEN SMARTER
- The U.S. is about to sell weapons to Vietnam. That's bad news for China.
- What the Middle Ages can tell us about the GOP's big charity myth
- Why is the Pentagon stuffing caves in Norway full of tanks?
- The most sensible GOP alternative to ObamaCare comes from a Senate candidate who is almost sure to lose
- 10 things you need to know today: October 23, 2014
- The one thing the New Atheists get right about religion
- 43 TV shows to watch in 2014
- How to be the most productive person in your office — and still get home by 5:30 p.m.
- The uncomfortable truth in The Giving Tree
- The U.S. government is actually trouncing Ebola. When will it get credit?
Subscribe to the Week