Wanted: People who hang out with crooks
The Albuquerque, N.M., Police Department is running classified ads in newspapers to recruit informants. The Help Wanted ad invites “people who hang out with crooks” to “make some extra cash” by sharing information with police, up to $50 for drug-crime information, and $700 for murder. The ad assures potential applicants that their résumés won’t be scrutinized. “Drug use and criminal record OK,” says the ad.

Schoolboy arrested for farting
A 12-year-old Florida boy has been arrested for farting in school. Arresting officer Warren Pettway said he was summoned to the school by a teacher, and that the unnamed minor admitted he “continually disrupted his classroom environment by breaking wind and shutting off several computers.” After this confession, Pettway said, “I informed him as a result of his behavior he was being charged with Disruption of a School Function.” The perpetrator was later released into the custody of his maternal parent.