should have gone to match.com
July 3, 2014
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A Denver teenager looking for love has instead found herself in a lot of trouble.

Federal authorities say that Shannon Maureen Conley, 19, of Arvada, Colorado met an ISIS fighter online, and was instantly smitten. She planned on traveling to Syria to aid the cause, but was arrested April 8 at the Denver International Airport by FBI agents and charged with conspiracy to provide material support to a designated foreign terrorist organization.

Conley, a certified nurse's aid, had told her online paramour — who, according to Conley's parents, is a 32-year-old Tunisian — that she would act as a nurse for his fellow fighters. She also planned on becoming his wife and living with him near the Turkish border.

On Wednesday, the court documents from April 9 were unsealed, and they spell out how Conley planned on joining her future husband. "Conley stated that she was aware her plans were potentially illegal and she could possibly get arrested, and therefore she has no intention to return to the U.S.," the affidavit read. She also told investigators she would engage in combat if she had to, "but she wouldn't like it."

In December, Conley spoke with investigators following an incident where she behaved strangely at Faith Bible Chapel in Arvada, the affidavit said. She said she joined the U.S. Army Explorers and was going to use the training overseas, and "also intended to train Islamic Jihadi fighters in U.S. military tactics." The affidavit also said she had wanted to serve in the U.S. military but didn't believe it would accept her religious beliefs.

At the time, the investigators attempted to veer Conley away from her goal of joining ISIS, and asked her parents — who did not approve of her plan — to help. Catherine Garcia

2016 Watch
2:43 p.m. ET
Win McNamee/Getty Images

Former Rhode Island Gov. Lincoln Chafee is expected to formally enter the 2016 presidential race June 3, a source told Politico on Friday. Chafee's spokesperson told MSNBC there'd be a "major announcement."

Chafee, 62, became a Democrat midway through his term as governor, which ended earlier this year. He served in the U.S. Senate from 1999 to 2007 as a Republican.

Chafee is slated to speak at George Mason University in Arlington, Virginia, at 5:30 p.m. Wednesday. He would face Hillary Clinton, Sen. Bernie Sanders, and likely former Maryland Gov. Martin O'Malley (expected to announce Saturday) in a Democratic primary. Julie Kliegman

guitar-player-in-chief?
2:23 p.m. ET

There have been rumblings that former two-term Maryland governor Martin O'Malley will seek the Democratic nomination for president in 2016. But if you prefer guitar picking to "rumblings," let the video below help you make your decision:

O'Malley, who BuzzFeed reports is trying to position himself as a more authentic alternative to frontrunner Hillary Clinton, is set to make a special "announcement" Saturday in Baltimore, and will head to the crucial election states of Iowa and New Hampshire soon after. Samantha Rollins

For those who have everything
2:20 p.m. ET
Courtesy Quiksilver

A standard-issue wet suit might be stylish enough for many surfers, but a True Wetsuit ($2,500) "lets you go straight from the boardroom to the beach," says Diana Bruk at Esquire. Each suit is made of neoprene from the tie to the trouser cuff, so it's completely waterproof ("a useful asset at the office when you spill coffee all over yourself"). Quiksilver, a Japanese retailer of surf and snowboarding gear, makes it in three styles, including a slim-cut tuxedo. "If you love riding waves but hate the mundane, skintight look of a wet suit, the stylish solution of your dreams is here." The Week Staff

zzzzzzz
2:07 p.m. ET
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Women get more sleep than men do, according to a new report on 941,329 smartphone users across 47 countries.

Despite women enjoying anywhere from four to 34 minutes of extra shut-eye, men wake up happier in all but three of those countries, according to data from Sleep Cycle, a smartphone app that tracks users' sleep cycles. Columbia, Portugal, and Ukraine were the exceptions. The study tracked voluntary participants between ages 18 and 55 over a 10-month period.

Gender aside, which country is the unhappiest rolling out of bed? That'd be Japan. Julie Kliegman

Uh oh
1:34 p.m. ET
Neilson Barnard/Getty Images

Who run the world? Sony.

Since and rapper Jay Z launched his premium music streaming service Tidal earlier this year, the company has been plagued by an onslaught of bad press. Now, several of Tidal's co-owners, most notably Jay's wife Beyoncé, might be forced to pull their music from the platform over a streaming rights battle with record label Sony.

According to a Bloomberg Business profile, which elaborates on Tidal's shortcomings, Sony is asking for "large advances" for the rights to stream the catalogs of its artists, which include Beyoncé and other co-owners Daft Punk, Usher, and Alicia Keys. However, the article also notes that Tidal remains well funded, so it's quite possible Jay Z can cough up the asking price.

Aside from initial knee-jerk reactions, which criticized Jay — a multi-million dollar mogul — for complaining about musicians not making enough money, the company continued to suffer the media's wrath and skepticism. Additionally, there were misstatements about a Sprint investment that didn't exist, and the rapper's own attempt to call out Tidal's haters didn't go over swimmingly.

Beyoncé and Nicki Minaj exclusively premiered their new video for song "Feelin' Myself" on Tidal just weeks ago, which surely should have given subscriber numbers a boost. But if Tidal loses the rights to Beyoncé's music and devoted fanbase, I can only imagine Jay Z won't be feeling himself. Stephanie Talmadge

FIFA
1:19 p.m. ET
Harold Cunningham/Getty Images

As expected, FIFA president Sepp Blatter cruised to re-election today, despite allegations that he presided over a culture of corruption that reached the top levels of soccer's global governing organization. Thought to be buoyed by support from African, Asian, and South American countries, Blatter beat his challenger Prince Ali bin al-Hussein of Jordan 133 nations to 73 (three ballots were invalid). The vote was held only miles from the Swiss hotel where many of his lieutenants were arrested on corruption charges Wednesday.

"I will accept this responsibility and I want to fix FIFA together with you," Blatter, 79, told the voting body Friday just before he was elected to his fifth term. "I want to do it now and tomorrow and the day after and the weeks and months to come so that at the end of my term of office, I will be able to hand over a solid FIFA, a FIFA that will have emerged from the storm." Julie Kliegman

Only in America
11:53 a.m. ET
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A U.S. Marine is appealing a court-martial for refusing to remove a Bible verse from her desk. Monifa Sterling posted the Old Testament passage "No weapon formed against me shall prosper," which her supervisors deemed to be "contrary to good order and discipline" because the workplace must remain free of "divisive or contentious issues," such as politics and religion. The Week Staff

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