4 annoying ways climate change will make your life a bummer
Brace yourself for watered-down beers and more spring sneezing
Within the next few decades, carbon emissions could cause global temperatures to rise between 4 and 11 degrees Fahrenheit, melting ice caps and causing sea levels to rise. The price of crops like coffee and chocolate will skyrocket, and countless cuddly animals around the globe could be wiped out. And yet, a lot of people find it hard to really care about climate change. But don't be fooled: Climate change will affect you. Here's a brief sampling of ways that warmer temperatures will suck the fun out of your life:
1. Your flights will be more turbulent
Fasten your seatbelts! Your flying nightmare is about to get a lot worse. In addition to dealing with the sluggish and sometimes-handsy TSA, suffering through bad reruns of bad NBC sitcoms on the overhead screen, and trying to squeeze cheap lotion out of comically tiny bottles, you're now going to have to deal with massively bumpier flights. According to a new study published in the journal Nature Climate Change, computer simulations have discovered a link between warmer jet streams and clear-air turbulence (i.e. non-stormy weather). Researchers found that the amount of turbulence will roughly double by the year 2050 — and significantly increase in intensity.
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2. Your ski vacation will be ruined
That weekend ski trip you take every January? Pretty soon it'll be a lot harder to book a cabin. According to The New York Times, more than half of the 103 ski resorts in the northeastern United States will not be able to maintain a 100-day season by the year 2039. Out west, Park City, Utah, could lose all its snowpack by then, and ski resorts all over Colorado could see ski season dramatically condensed. But at least you'll still be able to hit the beaches and surf a few waves come summertime, right? Oh wait.
3. Your allergy symptoms will be way worse
Spring is in the air. And with it, all the nasty, spiky micro-pollens that make 1 in 5 Americans' sinuses go haywire. According to a 2011 study from Quest Diagnostics, warmer temperatures are already causing common airborne allergens like ragweed and mold to thrive. Gesundheit.
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4. You'll have a harder time getting drunk
Consuming alcohol — the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems — is about to get a tad more difficult. More specifically: Beer could become a commodity. According to a 2009 study from Czech climatologists, hop-growing regions in eastern Germany and central Slovenia are already having a harder time cultivating the crops necessary for their signature pilsners. The culprit? Warmer air temperatures, of course. For your palate, that means watered-down brews with less hoppy bite. For your pocketbook, that means... well, let's not go there.
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