Inside the mind of a marriage counselor

Sometimes, helping a couple make amends isn't the goal

Marriage counseling.
(Image credit: Sean Prior / Alamy Stock Photo)

Recently, during a consultation with a couple interested in therapy, the husband asked, "So Sherry, how many marriages have you saved?"

It's a reasonable enough question. One way to gauge my effectiveness as a marriage counselor could be by tallying the number of relationship rescues I've got under my belt. But in the 11 years I've been doing this work, I've learned that the best barometer of a marriage counselor's "success" is not as clear-cut as, say, a baseball manager who lives or dies by his win-loss record, or a plumber who either fixes the leak or can't stop the drip, drip, drip.

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