corrections & clarifications
A frantic Massachusetts woman called police Saturday night after hearing banging noises in her home. Police rushed to the scene, only to find no signs of a break-in. They did, however, find — as The Associated Press so elegantly puts it — "a soot-covered wood duck."
"It sounded like someone was in the house going through all of our things," Melinda Costanzo of North Reading told The Daily Mail. "I was convinced someone was in the house. I was trembling." Costanzo can sleep easier tonight knowing water fowl were the only intruders in her home.
The officers concluded that the duck had flown in through the chimney. Luckily, the bird was forgiven of its crimes — according to The Associated Press, "an officer caught the duck and released it into a nearby pond."