Welcome to The Week's "What Next?" contest, an invitation to test your powers of imagination with challenges inspired by current events.

Click here for the results of the previous contest: The United Nations of America

This week's question: Burlington, Vt., restaurants are adding 18 percent to the bills of French-speaking diners on the grounds that Quebecers are "bad tippers." We asked you if restaurants in Quebec were to retaliate, how would they get even with American tourists?



THE WINNER: Serve French-sized portions
Janna Cohen, Stone Ridge, NY

SECOND PLACE: American customers seated only if they can find Quebec on a map
Chris O'Connor, Hermosa Beach, CA 

THIRD PLACE: "La Marseillaise" played at random intervals. Standing required.
John Walsh, Mercer Island, WA


Americans required to mime their orders
Sam Yoder, Portland, OR

Waiters do their best Nutty Professor, in French
Bill DuPre, Raleigh, NC

Ice: $1 per cube
Paul Hlavac, Lake Bluff, IL

All TV sets set to the curling channel
Ken Kellam III, Dallas, TX

No deep-fried foods served
Andrew Hogan, Jamesville, NY

18% maintenance fee for overstressed chairs
Richard Block, Valencia, CA

All Americans must wear berets
Sheldon Benardo, Bronx, NY

Customers must say, "I love the French," to order fries
Charles & Mary Parry, Catonsville, MD

Corn syrup substituted for maple on breakfast pancakes
Mel Raab, Beverly Hills, CA

Free Poutine!
Ian Stedman, Chatsworth, CA

Free French wine with every meal. Sodas and ice tea, $10. (No free refills)
Pete Brown, Tucson, AS

Everything on menu contains escargot
Sarah G. Storm, Ventura, CA

18% surcharge for elastic-waist pants
Debra Hull, Bethany, WV

Mandatory iPhone valet service
Shannon Pryor, Lexington, KY

No "All You Can Eat" Buffets
Mark Weaver, Redondo Beach, CA

English speaking waiter: 20% surcharge
Matt Gough, Sunnyvale, CA

18% gratuity added to diners who mispronounce French wines
Julia R. Suarez, Plano, TX

Ketchup not served
Carl Keitner, Barrington, RI

Baseball caps removed upon being seated
Mort Oakes, Dover, PA

Diners must watch "Honey Boo Boo" show while they eat
Jerry Martzell, Greenville, OH

American parents required to tie their children to the chairs so they don't run around
Cindy Stone, Nashville, TN

Raise the price of Canadian bacon 
Alex Charney, Mendham, NJ

Serve American food
Joel Slutsky, Alstead, NH