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The government calls it a “fiscal stimulus,” my grandma called it “gambling money,” says Joel Stein in the Los Angeles Times. Top companies still hire in a down economy, says Marshall Loeb in MarketWatch . . .

Love and stimulus

The government calls it a “fiscal stimulus,” my grandma called it “gambling money,” says Joel Stein in the Los Angeles Times. “Same idea. They both want a kiss.” And we’re supposed to go out and spend our check, as if “that will make our houses worth a lot again.” Who in their right mind “would give us more money after what we’ve done with ours” so far? The government. Why? It’s “super-insecure and desperate to be liked”—you’d be too if you got voted on every few years. The stimulus will only get us into more trouble—maybe we should reassure our government that it’s “good-looking and funny,” and that we’ll love it “no matter what.”

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