‘Catwoman’ denies having plastic surgery

New York socialite Jocelyn ‘Catwoman’ Wildenstein has denied ever having plastic surgery, during her first televised interview in more than 20 years. The 77-year-old says it is her Swiss heritage that has given her “high cheekbones and long hair” and made her “look like Brigitte Bardot.”

Iran says West ‘used lizards as spies’

The former chief-of-staff of Iran’s armed forces has accused Western spies of using lizards to spy on his country’s nuclear program. Hassan Firuzabadi cited the arrest several years ago of aid workers who were in possession of lizards whose “skin attracts atomic waves”, making them ideal “nuclear spies.”

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Fireworks and lasers used in battle against crows

Officials in Trenton, New Jersey, have revealed a plan to used lasers, fireworks and amplified recordings of crow distress calls to battle an influx of the birds. According to local reports, more than 30,000 crows have taken up residence in the city, and are causing a public health nuisance.