go ninja go ninja go
The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise has a long and storied history of ill-conceived rap tie-ins — but "Shell Shocked," the collaborative rap single from the upcoming Michael Bay-produced reboot of the franchise, might be the most awkward yet. If you've ever wanted to hear three grown men desperately attempt to work references to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles into an otherwise generic rap anthem, look no further.
Wiz Khalifa manages to spit an entire verse without a single clear reference to the Ninja Turtles — just some generic references to saving the city and loving his brothers. Ty Dolla $ign musters a weak shout-out to cheesy pizza.
But their meager efforts pale in comparison to Juicy J's hilarious attempt to shoehorn as many Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles references in his 45-second verse. A representative sampling:
1. "You know I got your back — just like a turtle shell"
2. "Nobody do it better. All my brothers trying to get some cheddar. We all wanna cut like the Shredder."
3. "Bought the orange Lamborghini, call it Michelangelo. With the nunchuck doors, and I'm pulling up slow"
4. "All this green in my pockets, you can call it Turtle Power."
Listen to the new single below, and prepare to have "Knock knock, you about to get shell shocked" stuck in your head for the rest of the day. --Scott Meslow