George W. Bush's most terrifying moment in office wasn't during 9/11

Former President George W. Bush
(Image credit: SAUL LOEB/AFP/GettyImages)

George W. Bush was never more afraid than when he stood on the mound at Yankee Stadium on October 30, 2001. It had been 48 days since 9/11, and he had not been more nervous then. Nor would he be more nervous during Hurricane Katrina, or the 2007 financial collapse. It was there, on the mound, that he was his most afraid.

"Your adrenaline isn't surging during decisions," Bush told Grantland. "Decisions were very deliberate. I listened to a lot of good people, and when I made up my mind, I made up my mind. And I feel good about making those decisions based upon what I thought was in the best interest of the country."

But then there was that first pitch — and he didn't want to bounce it.

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[...] He thought about the pitch itself. He thought about the other time he'd thrown a first pitch as president, at a Brewers game. He'd put it in the dirt. His dad had bounced it when he was president too. Both he and his dad had played baseball at Yale — the senior Bush was team captain, the younger never made varsity. And bouncing it had been mortifying. "We're pretty competitive people," he said.He hadn't had much time to prepare, squeezing in a game of catch with his press secretary, Ari Fleischer, in the South Lawn to loosen up. So he knew he faced the prospect of embarrassment in front of a stadium of people who hadn't voted for him, and more.As he walked out to the mound, wearing an FDNY pullover over a flak jacket, as the voice of Bob Sheppard — "Ladies and gentlemen" — faded into the great sound of the crowd, he had a sense that something more was at stake than pride.

Read the entire piece over at Grantland, and check out the ESPN documentary on Bush's first pitch, below. Jeva Lange

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Jeva Lange

Jeva Lange was the executive editor at TheWeek.com. She formerly served as The Week's deputy editor and culture critic. She is also a contributor to Screen Slate, and her writing has appeared in The New York Daily News, The Awl, Vice, and Gothamist, among other publications. Jeva lives in New York City. Follow her on Twitter.