Speed Reads

Late Night Tackles President Trump

Stephen Colbert imagines if Jesus tweeted like Donald Trump

Stephen Colbert mocks Donald Trump holiday tweeting

Stephen Colbert kicked off Tuesday's Late Show by saying it was good to be back to work after the holidays, and noting that Congress also returned to work on Tuesday — except House Republicans, who got a head start, voting in secret on Monday to eviscerate the independent Office of Congressional Ethics. The GOP backtracked on Tuesday after intense blowback — including from President-elect Donald Trump. "Man, when Donald Trump calls you out for being unethical, that's a wake-up call," Colbert said. "That's like if Keith Richards told you to moisturize."

Colbert then turned to Trump's holiday tweeting, starting with a 140-character pat on the back Trump gave himself over America's rising consumer confidence. "That's right, Donald Trump thanked himself in the third person — Stephen Colbert thinks that's crazy," Colbert said. But he got the most mileage out of a Trump New Year's tweet wishing a good year for everyone, including his "many enemies and those who have fought me and lost so badly they just don't know what to do. Love!" Colbert offered what appeared to be a charitable interpretation: "In the holiday spirit, Donald Trump is loving his enemies. It reminds me of Jesus' famous tweet: 'Suck it @PontiusPilate. I rose from the dead. @TheRealJesus is gonna live forever. Love!'"

Sadly, that was the only @TheRealJesus tweet Colbert rolled out on Tuesday — he's hoping for more in the future — but he displayed some greeting cards based on "Donald Trump's hallmark of sending well-wishes while simultaneously insulting your enemies." The last one involved Russia, and Colbert ended his monologue on Trump's continued insistence that Russia may not have tried to hack the presidential election in Trump's favor. Watch below. Peter Weber