Speed Reads

Last Night on Late Night

Late night hosts recap Biden's papal conclave and COP26 summit, mock the Trumps' 'tomahawk chop' game night

President Biden is abroad on a European tour, and his "first stop was the Vatican, where he met with Supreme Pontiff Pope Francis," Stephen Colbert said on Monday's Late Show. "Biden has gotten flak from right-wing Catholic bishops for being pro-choice, but during the meeting, the pope said he could keep receiving communion and called Biden a 'good Catholic,'" a legitimizing compliment he put on par with "a bear telling you you're good at pooping in the woods."

"From Italy," Colbert said, "Biden flew to Glasgow for the U.N. climate conference known as COP26, in honor of the 26th year they cop out of doing anything about climate change."

"COP26 sounds like a Bruce Willis movie that never actually got made," Trevor Noah said at The Daily Show, but "it's actually the most important annual climate change conference in the world. Although that doesn't mean that it's the most exciting conference in the world." He showed Biden appearing to doze off: "Look, I know that the haters are going to say that Biden was falling asleep during the climate conference, but think about it: How are we going to save the climate? Not using energy, that's how. What the one time you're not using as much energy? When you're sleeping. So Joe Biden was just doing his part."

Jimmy Kimmel had another climate change solution, but it took a long setup to get there, starting with Halloween jokes. "Speaking of outdated pumpkins, Donald Trump was in Atlanta on Saturday night, he was at Game 4 of the World Series," after threatening to boycott baseball, Atlanta, and Coke last April. "Six months later, he's guzzling Diet Coke and doing the 'tomahawk chop' at a Braves game in Atlanta," Kimmel said. "Trump has a lot of resentment toward Native Americans, because they know how to run successful casinos."

Still, "the top Trump at the game was Melania, who made her first public appearance since July, and she really seemed to have a terrific time," Kimmel deadpanned, showing the former first lady pull a face after turning from her husband. "If we could somehow harness the energy of Melania's hatred for Donald Trump, we could power the world."

"During a World Series game over the weekend, former President Trump and first lady Melania Trump did the so-called 'tomahawk chop' with Atlanta Braves fans," Late Night's Seth Meyers said. "They were hesitant at first, until advisers assured them that it was racist."