July 17, 2014

The Democrats only have Hillary Clinton for 2016, but Republicans have "a buffet of enticing options," said Stephen Colbert on Wednesday night's Colbert Report. But his "personal favorite," Colbert added, is "Texas Governor — and cartoon of a Texas governor — Rick Perry." He walked through all the things that crashed-and-burned Perry's 2012 presidential run, culminating in his infamous "oops" moment during a debate, when he could only list two of three federal agencies he'd pledged to eliminate.

But after "two years of agonizing reappraisal, the governor has completely reinvented himself — with a pair of glasses," Colbert said. The fashionable glasses have drawn some criticism — one Texas official called him a "West Coast metrosexual" — but Colbert insisted that the spectacles make Perry "look smarter, more serious, and... [long pause] ...oops." Still, that's not the only cosmetic change: Perry has also given up his cowboy boots, to protect his bad back. Perry's switch to loafers is too much for Colbert: A Texas governor swearing-off cowboy boots is "like the governor of Colorado turning his bong back into an apple." Or something. --Peter Weber

3:47 a.m. ET

Donald Trump's campaign launched a new nightly program on Facebook Monday called Trump Tower Live, Jimmy Kimmel noted on Tuesday's Kimmel Live, and some people think this is the precursor to a new Trump-branded media empire, Trump TV, "which is great news — finally we get a chance to see Donald Trump on TV," Kimmel joked. "But if you're wondering what Trump TV might possibly look like, they are already pushing their first scripted series, based on a popular conspiracy theory." He showed a preview, and it combines The Walking Dead and Hillary Clinton supporters. "I think it's going to be a hit," Kimmel said. And were it real, he could be right. Watch below. Peter Weber

3:14 a.m. ET

On Tuesday's Kelly File, Megyn Kelly had former House Speaker Newt Gingrich on to make the case for Donald Trump, and retired Marine Gen. John Allen — former head of U.S. Central Command — on to discuss why he's supporting Hillary Clinton. If you get to choose between the two as your public advocate, go with Allen.

"I want to ask you, because it is extraordinary to see a general like you come out and get political, what made you do it?" Kelly asked, after playing part of a new Clinton campaign ad starring Allen. The four-star general said he felt it necessary to express his "very clear support for the person I believe utterly should be the next commander in chief." Let's talk about that, Kelly said. Clinton "does have a foreign policy record — unlike Trump," she added, "and it's not... it's far from perfect, let's put it that way."

Clinton supported the Libya intervention, the Iran nuclear deal, "and certainly she underestimated the security threat in Benghazi," Kelly said. "So how can you, as a general serving in the positions you have, support her for commander in chief?" Allen said Clinton "has responded to many of those concerns, particularly Benghazi," and from his many interactions with her in Afghanistan and the Situation Room, "she's calm, she understands international relations, she understands that the influence of America is best exerted through our relationships overseas and through our alliances and parterships."

"But what about Trump and [Russian President Vladimir] Putin?" Kelly asked. "You know, he says he understands that too." Putin is watching this election "very, very closely, Megyn," Allen said, "and when one of the two principal candidates for the president of the United States in fact cheerleads the dissolution of the EU or would talk about not being willing to honor Article 5 of the NATO charter, we've got some real reason for Putin to want to see a particular individual in the Oval Office."

Kelly asked if Putin, a "former KGB guy" is studying Clinton and Trump, and Allen said "there's no question about that. They've got the voice prints, they can tell when someone is agitated, they can tell when someone is angry, they can tell when someone is telling the truth or not telling the truth, and all of this is to ensure that in a crisis, they can push the buttons they think they need to for that crisis to go their way." Peter Weber

2:09 a.m. ET
Robyn Beck/AFP/Getty Images

Joe Arpaio, the sheriff of Maricopa County, Arizona, who has garnered national attention for his hardline approach to dealing with undocumented immigrants, was officially charged on Tuesday with criminal contempt of court.

The Justice Department said two weeks ago that Arpaio, 84, would be charged, but the misdemeanor count was not officially filed until Tuesday. Arpaio is serving his fifth term as sheriff, and is up for re-election in two weeks; if convicted, he could face up to six months in jail. In December 2011, a judge issued a court order that banned Arpaio's deputies from detaining people based only on the suspicion they were an undocumented immigrant and without cause to believe they committed a crime, The Arizona Republic reports. The judge determined two years later that Arpaio's office had racially profiled Latinos, with officers continuing to detain undocumented immigrants for more than a year after the original court order. Arpaio has said he unintentionally defied the order. The trial is set to begin on Dec. 6.

Arpaio's opponent in the sheriff's race, Paul Penzone, called the charge "another example of the sheriff putting his own personal objectives ahead of the best interest of the community at our expense." Arpaio's lawyer, Mel McDonald, said his client will plead not guilty, and they "believe that when the final chapter is written, he will be vindicated." Arpaio has been investigated before, including four years ago when it was alleged he retaliated against two police officers and a judge by accusing them of corruption. So far, Maricopa County taxpayers have had to pay $48 million to defend Arpaio in the racial profiling case, and that number is expected to balloon up to $72 million by next summer, The Associated Press reports. Catherine Garcia

1:44 a.m. ET

Phil Collins officially un-retired last year, and proved it with a return to the stage in August, a two-song set to kick off the U.S. Open. He is promoting a new memoir, Not Dead Yet, going on tour next summer, and on Tuesday's Tonight Show, he played one of his darkest and arguably his best song, "In the Air Tonight," from his 1981 album, Face Value. Due to nerve damage, Collins can't play the drums himself anymore — his son Nicholas will play on tour — but Jimmy Fallon's house band The Roots backed Collins on Tuesday's show. Collins and his voice have both aged a bit in the 35 years since he first released the song, but the drum fill at the 3:25 mark — Questlove's dramatic entry in the song — is as good as ever, and there are a few tasteful new additions to the instrumentation. Peter Weber

1:17 a.m. ET
AFP/Getty Images

Following South Africa and Burundi, Gambia said Tuesday it will leave the International Criminal Court.

When announcing its exit, the Gambian government called the ICC the "international Caucasian court" and said it is just targeting countries in Africa. The primary mission of the ICC is "to help put an end to impunity for the perpetrators of the most serious crimes of concern to the international community as a whole, and thus to contribute to the prevention of such crimes." It is based in The Hague, and the chief prosecutor is Gambian Fatou Bensouda.

Of the six ICC cases that are underway or close to starting, only Africans have been charged, but there are preliminary ICC investigations opened in other areas of the world, The Associated Press reports. Under the late Nelson Mandela, South Africa supported the ICC, but the country recently told the U.N. secretary-general it is leaving the court. Burundi did the same last week, when the president signed legislation to exit from the ICC. Catherine Garcia

1:08 a.m. ET

The United States appears on the verge of electing its first female president, and not everyone's cool with that, Samantha Bee said on Monday's Full Frontal. She illustrated that point with a series of clips of people talking about Hillary Clinton, from Fox News talking heads to people at Donald Trump rallies saying really gross things. "To learn more about the downside of lady leaders," Bee said, she went to meet with former secretary of state, current Clinton supporter, "and fellow nasty woman" Madeleine Albright.

"So, does playing into her woman-ness help Hillary, or does reminding people that she's a woman hurt her chances of winning the election?" Bee asked Albright, after they settled in at a mythical U.N. ladies' lounge. "I think it's very hard to tell, frankly," Albright said, but Trump making disparaging comments on Clinton's voice or looks sort of feeds the beast. "Does this pulsing cancer of misogyny go away, or does it just embolden people, like the racists during Obama's presidency?" Bee asked. "I think that you might ask some of the women heads of state what's happened in their countries," Albright said, reasonably.

"Women heads of state — I forgot other countries have those," Bee said, but she found several who would go on camera with her: Norwegian Prime Minister Erna Solberg, Chilean President Michelle Bachelet, President Hilda Heine of the Marshall Islands, and Croatian President Kolinda Grabar-Kitarovic. Based on their experiences, a President Hillary could expect a little added indignity in her first few months in office, but nothing worse than she has experienced during the campaign. Still, she should be grateful she doesn't have any celebrity doppelgängers, and it looks like she would get the most respect from her nation if her nation were the Marshall Islands. Watch below. Peter Weber

12:16 a.m. ET
Jason Miller/Getty Images

The Cleveland Indians took Game 1 of the World Series on Tuesday night in Cleveland, beating the Chicago Cubs 6-0 thanks largely to catcher Roberto Perez's bat and starting pitcher Corey Kluber's arm. Kluber faced off against Cubs ace Jon Lester, but while Lester had a rough start, allowing two runs in the first inning thanks to a series of walks and a hit by pitch, Kluber pitched six scoreless innings to earn the win. Perez hit a solo homer in the fourth off Lester, then drove in three more runs with a second homer in the bottom of the eighth.

The Cubs and Indians have a combined 176-year championship drought; the Indians last won the World Series in 1948, and the Cubs in 1908. They meet again for Game 2 on Wednesday night, also in Cleveland. Peter Weber

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