Country Life magazine has published a 39-step guide to becoming a lady - to the bemusement of readers.
It follows on from their guide to becoming a gentleman and presents itself as a "part serious, part tongue-in-cheek" list of qualities that define a modern lady.
So what maketh a lady according to Country Life? She is neither early for a dinner party nor late for church, doesn't over-pluck her eyebrows and excels at making love, lasagne and long gin and tonics.
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The perfect lady can also paunch a rabbit, pluck a pheasant and gut a fish - but allows men the privilege. She also might not understand the rules of rugby and cricket, but enjoys them anyway.
While the gentleman's list involves travelling and sailing, the ladies list is dominated by cooking, looking after children and tending to her appearance (Number 31: a lady is never afraid to overdress).
This hasn't gone down with commentators, who argue that the list is a "depressingly domestic" reinforcement of traditional gender roles.
"That's being a lady, you see, demurely folding your own capable hands in your lap and letting your chap get on with the 'manly' tasks, because that's how it's always been done," says the Daily Telegraph's Claire Cohen.
More worrying, the list appears to suggest that putting up with sexual harassment is ladylike, says Cohen.
Number 20 on the list – a Lady knows how to deflect a lecher with grace – sparked a fierce response from journalist Daisy Buchanan.
"Does screaming 'F*** OFF YOU MASSIVE PERV, OR I'LL TELL YOUR MUM' count as 'grace'?" she asked.
In response, Buchanan has comprised an alternative list of steps to being a lady, which includes making a decent stab at minor repairs on boilers, laptops and washing machines, swearing periodically and owning some underwear that was not bought as a multipack.
The full Country Life list
A lady...
1 Finds laughter is the best medicine
2 Can say 'thank you' no matter where she is in the world
3 Cooks perfect, crispy roast potatoes
4 Offers to split the bill
5 Knows that everyone, including herself, improves with age
6 Offers the builder a cup of tea
7 Excels at making love, lasagne and long gin and tonics
8 Can silence a man with a stare and make a dog lie down with a hand signal — and vice versa
9 Can imitate Piglet and Pooh voices for a bedtime story
10 Prefers Mr Knightley to Mr Wickham, but is secretly in love with Rupert Campbell-Black
11 Never downs a drink in one, unless it's a shot of tequila
12 Is aware that the school run and dog walking do not require full make-up
13 Never wears shoes she can't walk in
14 Knows when a man is spoken for
15 Can paunch a rabbit, pluck a pheasant and gut a fish, but allows men the privilege
16 Remembers her godchildren's birthdays
17 Knows songs for a long car journey
18 Is neither early for a dinner party nor late for church
19 Doesn't over-pluck her eyebrows
20 Knows how to deflect a lecher with grace, and a proposal with kindness
21 Comforts nervous flyers
22 Would never have Botox
23 Knows when to let a man think it's his idea
24 Would never own a handbag dog
25 Can tie — and untie — a bow tie
26 Might not understand the rules of rugby and cricket, but enjoys the game anyway
27 Knows when to take control in the bedroom and the boardroom
28 Knows the difference between Bentley & Skinner and Baddiel and Skinner
29 Instils manners in her children, but lets their characters flourish
30 Knows when to deadhead a rose
31 Is never afraid to overdress
32 Can handle a sports car, a sit-on mower and a ski lift
33 Knows when to stop dyeing her hair
34 Teaches her son to iron his shirts and her daughter to change a fuse
35 Owns a little black dress
36 Always has a hanky
37 Knows that 'brevity is the soul of lingerie'
38 Has kissed several frogs and made them feel like princes
39 However lucky in life, she doesn't boast on Facebook
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