The Week contest: Papa was a Rolling Stone
If Keith Richards were to release a book of parenting tips, what should it be titled?

Last week's question: Keith Richards recently revealed that when his daughters were teens, he carefully vetted their potential boyfriends, and once threatened an overly amorous suitor with castration. If the Rolling Stones' guitarist were to release a book of parenting tips, what should it be titled?
Results:
THE WINNER: "Hey! You! Get Off of My Daughter!"
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Virginia Schaller, Houghton, Mich.
SECOND PLACE: "The Unconscious Parent"
Claire Ziffer, Union Grove, Wis.
THIRD PLACE: "Kids, You Can't Always Get What You Want"
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Dave DiGregorio, West Hollywood, Calif.
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
"Under My Roof, Under My Thumb."
Michael Bell, West Palm Beach, Fla.
"19th Nervous Boyfriend: How to Win Respect and Influence Suitors"
Ken Kellam III, Dallas
"The Start-Me-Up Guide for New Parents"
Janine Witte, New Hope, Pa.
"Steel Training Wheels"
Paul Raff, Santa Monica, Calif.
"Sex, Drugs, and Rockabye Baby"
Ivan Kershner, Salem, S.C
"Sympathy for the Little Devils"
Dennis Briggs, Coppell, Texas
"Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo (As I Say, Not As I Do)"
Eric Burkhart, Berkeley, Calif.
"Patrolling Stone"
Evan Cantor, Boulder, Colo.
Father's Little Helper
Bob Rosenbaum, Cleveland Heights, Ohio
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