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A New Zealand man showed up at a hospital emergency room with a live eel in his rectum.

Everyone's talking about...
A New Zealand man showed up at a hospital emergency room with a live eel in his rectum. The man gave no explanation as to how the wriggling creature ended up where it was, but doctors were apparently able to remove it without complication. “The eel was about the size of a decent sprig of asparagus,” said a hospital employee, “and the incident is the talk of the place.”

Prince Harry's fears of death
Prince Harry has blamed his naked Las Vegas romp on a premonition that he would die in Afghanistan, says the National Enquirer. Photos of the prince, 28, playing strip pool in a hotel room hit the Internet and British newspapers last month, prompting an angry Queen Elizabeth to chastise him. Sources say Harry told his grandmother that “nagging visions of dying in action” had caused his reckless behavior, and that he wanted one last fling before the tour of duty he’s now on. The queen initially dismissed the explanation as a “well-rehearsed excuse,” though she softened after the Taliban attacked a British base last week and vowed to kill Harry.

Finding true love in Ireland
A Canadian dentist is flying to Ireland in hopes of finding and marrying a woman he spoke to for two minutes during a trip there last year. Sandy Crocker, 34, says he didn’t get the “striking” woman’s name while asking her for directions in the tourist town of Ennistymon, and can’t be sure she isn’t already married, but says she has reddish-brown hair and freckles, and is Irish. “She never left my mind,’’ Crocker said, “so I decided, ‘Why not go back and try and find her?’”

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