Good week, Bad week

Good week for: Selfish altruism, Miraculous landings, Bad sex; Bad week for: Playing defense, Paranoia, Taking responsibility

Good week for:

Selfish altruism, after Carlos Flores, 36, of New York, rescued an elderly man who had fallen onto the subway tracks. “I was thinking, If he gets hit I can’t go to work,” Flores explained. “It’s Sunday. It’s a time-and-a-half day.”

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Bad sex, after Britain’s Literary Review awarded its 2010 Bad Sex in Fiction Award to The Shape of Her by Rowan Somerville, for such passages as, “Like a lepidopterist mounting a tough-skinned insect with a too blunt pin he screwed himself into her.’’

Bad week for:

Playing defense, after President Obama took an elbow in the mouth while guarding another player during a basketball game, and needed 12 stitches in his lip.

Paranoia, after a 68-year-old man from Essex, England, lost his life savings of $125,000 when he left plastic bags stuffed with money on the roof of his car and drove off. The man, who doesn’t trust banks, likes to keep the cash in sight at all times.

Taking responsibility, after Buffalo Bills receiver Steve Johnson blamed God for letting him drop what would have been a game-winning touchdown pass. He tweeted: “I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! ILL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!!”

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