Feature

The Week contest: TSA - December 3, 2010

In its effort to thwart terrorists, the TSA has banned liquids, demanded we take off our shoes, and now, ordered either a full-body X-ray or a discomfiting pat-down. What will be its next step?

Welcome to The Week's "What Next?" contest, an invitation to test your powers of imagination with challenges inspired by current events.

Click here for results of last week's contest: Happy Meal

Results: Now that intimate screenings and pat-downs are underway, we asked you to predict the next security innovation at the airport check-in line. You touched us with:

WINNER: Notice: Your clothing may be reclaimed in the baggage area at your final destination.E. Milton Wilson, Claremont, CA SECOND PLACE: Walk-Thru ColonoscopyCarol Wagener, Seattle THIRD PLACE: Two character witnesses required per passengerJagdish Dalal, Avon, CT HONORABLE MENTIONS:

Pre-warmed Robotic Cavity CamerasTerry Davis, Troutdale, OR Explosive-sniffing ferrets will be inserted into your clothingAshley Ryan, Catonsville, MD Flyers must dance while receiving pat-downsMike Paul, Carrboro, NC Kindly bend forward and grab your anklesJames Hake, Naperville, IL Your choice: Hair or spitMarie McIntosh, Frankford, DE "Freedom Enemas"Roy Duggan, Memphis Teacher recommendation requiredAdina Friedman, Austin You must "friend" TSA on FacebookBeth Farris, San Francisco Gowns open in the back, pleaseWendy Eisendrath, Tumwater, WA The "Spelunk"Joe Abbott, Chico, CA Third baseAndrew Daniels, Hickory, NC The TSA will start a second line for those who just want a pat-down but don’t want to flyEdmund Conti, Raleigh, NC Everyone will have to jump rope 25 times to see if anything falls outRochelle Aronson, Oceanside, NY They will confiscate our milk money and give us a wedgieGary Brouillet, Downers Grove, IL

To reduce the Federal budget, TSA pat-downs will from now on be performed entirely by volunteersDavid Russell, Beaufort, SC

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