Months named for dictator

last updated 8 January 2015

Ashgabat, Turkmenistan

Turkmenistan’s megalomaniacal president-for-life, Saparmurat Niyazov, proposed this week that the months of the year be renamed for national heroes—like himself. He suggested calling January “Turkmenbashi,” a word that means “leader of all Turkmen” and is Niyazov’s self-appointed title. The rubber-stamp legislature enthusiastically agreed, and insisted that April be named for Niyazov’s late mother, Gurbansoltan. Countless streets, cities, and buildings are already named for the dictator, a former communist who has ruled Turkmenistan since the Soviet Union collapsed in 1991. “This is a joke,” Ashgabat resident Bairam Orazov said. “It seems like he lives on another planet.”